theHERETICisIN.

2008-12-25T02:32:00.002+08:00

Merry Christmas! Woooooooooooo.

And no, I'm not normally this flippy (as well you know. :>) I'm just luuuuuuurving my new lappytop! Hello World! Say hello to Gabriel (oh-so-swivelly HP TX2510), the latest addition to my male gadget harem -- which includes Alejandro (external hard drive), Santiago (iPod), Santino (work laptop), & Juanchito (usb). :D They're all pretty & shiny & black & MINE! :D

Must. Buy. Pretty pretty lappytop bag for Gabriel and all his (soon-to-be) accoutrements. :D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

2008-07-24T10:12:00.000+08:00

...I just need to rant to somebody. (How sad that "somebody" turns out to be my blog.)

I am STRESSED. I am fricking PISSED. I want to PUNCH somebody in the FACE.

...and of course, nobody's there.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...You Dirty, Dirty Liar!

2008-06-22T22:41:00.001+08:00

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

2008-05-25T22:31:00.002+08:00

People say it would've been so easy to text or call.

No, it wouldn't. And no, it's not.

Because people don't come. And the only time they would actually have come is right after the bloody fact when they only thing they can do is wring their hands and say, "oh, if only I'd come!"

In a parallel branching reality, those same people would be saying, "But it would've been so easy to text or call!"

Really. How would YOU know the gravity of that hesitant text, that tiny little call? No, you won't. You'll only know when it's too late.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...Hello?

2008-05-15T20:00:00.009+08:00

...without any ado at all, I'm back. Bow.

And for the life of me, I don't think I can write for shit anymore. XP Sadness. The piercing wit! The dazzling vocabulary repertoire! The legions of adoring fans! Gone. All. Gone. :<

**********

My New Love.

I. WANTS IT!!!!! I. REALLY. DO. WANTS IT!!!!!

**********

...So. How am I, you ask. Of course you care. You should care. How could you not care?

...HOW COULD YOU NOT CARE???

Ooooookay, got a bit neurotic there. :p Hemingway. Moving forward. ...Ick. Ahem. Moving on is what I meant. How am I? I am meandering around in a stagnant little pool of...meandering little things. Think little fishy things with wobbly, gloopy, on-the-whole-looks-rather-sluggish-dunnit bits.

...Obviously, I am having a mental breakdown. Hurrah hurrah. Will make working with the bosses much easier now, I expect.

"Falqi, what's the plan on lahdeedahdeedah? Let's get eksekseks on the blahblahblah and lock it today, let's get eksekseksnumbertwo aligned as well. What are the numbers behind the dududu plans? Have we confirmed this with all the possible people in the world? Let's just quickly check on all the possible data we have right now which is admittedly a lot but since I can order you around do it now & get back to me in 5 mins, there's a love. Oh and while you're at it go and do all this eks-wai-zee number of things which I expect you to do by the end of the week which you should because I have a whole slew of other things I want you to do over the weekend and oh by the way I'm not sure if you know what you're doing but you seem to trundling along just fine so hop along then, there we go, sple-he-he-ndid."

And I go: "duh?"

WUNNNNNDERFUL.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...........

2007-11-19T08:33:00.000+08:00

...What weekend?? Le sigh.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Sulky.

2007-11-04T19:10:00.000+08:00

Le sigh.

I think I wasted this wonderful 4-day vacation. :(

I need someone to hang out with. :(

Someone who actually replies (and preferably replies "yeah!") when I invite.
Someone who doesn't hang out with his/her folks. Horrible.
Someone I actually want to hang out with. :p

...And the intersection of all of these is.....NOBODY. :p

Boo.

I am morose.

And I'll damn well sulk because I damn well want to. :p

So there.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

....Fuck.

2007-09-26T23:20:00.000+08:00

...This damn shampoo business is more trouble than it's worth. :p When you look at it, at the end of the day, you're really just selling fucking shampoos anyway. Arrrrrrgh.

*edit*
...tsk tsk tsk. Not being a superstar ABM. :p (I say this in the most sarcastic voice possible.)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hello all. :D

2007-07-07T18:45:00.000+08:00

Check out the team's OrSem video!:D:D:D

http://ateneoarnis.multiply.com/video/item/4

Yaaaaaaaaaaaay they're the best. :D Grabe, I feel so old and unskilled already. :p Off to atrophy my piddling biceps to nothingness in the corporate world.:p

Can I just say. Work is really something else. :p It (sadly!) requires a tradeoff from physical and intellectual exertion, something that wasn't really all that high in my Ten Most Wanted list in the first place. With the most wonderful fantabulous bonus that intellectual fatigue just plain SUCKS.

Sorry, can I just say that again? INTELLECTUAL FATIGUE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS. It has nothing of the endorphin rushes and highs that physical fatigue can offer, that wonderful soaring feeling of LET'S GET IT ON!!!--something that's a bit hard to dredge up when you're pumping up to do Excel sheets and email all day. Booooo.

Earlier today I realized my pain tolerance has plummeted down to the negatives already. Good GOD. I SUCK. :p I act like a girl again in a fight--the old girly cowering instincts are back. :p GodDAMN.

...............

That said, can I just say again: INTELLECTUAL FATIGUE SUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS. I read in The Battle For God (Karen Armstrong) that some intellectuals, including Newton, have been transported to higher states of mind through sheer...well, thinking, but good GOD. PLEEEEEASE.

...So let's move on.:D (intellectual fatigue suuuuucks) Work is pretty good naman actually, considering. I don't think I regret turning down the Singapore offer (well every now and then lang when I look at my piddling bank account)--still tons of things to do here at home. Question is, do I still have time to do them? ...Of course not!XP But still, we try. :p As is inherent in the human psyche. We try. :p

..................

I so would like to get my hands on a car. Any car. (...well, there's still a threshold, mind.) One of the downfalls of having pobre family and non-Makati boyfriend. :( Booooo. Konting buwan na lang...! I hate having to go home at 10pm every day just because Daddy always leaves me behind (no ohana! :c)--in a taxi, no less! (kasi ayoko na magcommute dahil pagod na ako. Ayoko naman mamatay nang maaga dahil lang sa pagod -- corny. :p) Goodbye munny. :p

ANYWAY. We must take steps to live life. :D Especially now that we are marginally richer than ever before -- yaaaaaaaaaay. :D So many things to do, so little time! (...and so little energy.:p Why, you ask? Because INTELLECTUAL FATIGUE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS. :p)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...random thoughts while digesting.

2007-05-30T00:18:00.000+08:00

Some random thoughts I churned out while waiting for my lunch to go down so I could go to the gym.:D Note, extremely stream of consciousness here.:D

Atheist. Am I an atheist? Do I believe that 'God' exists? ...What is God and how does he/it exist? How can I prove it exists?ö Queer. However, I can't discount the fact of virtually all peoples throughout history believing in...something. Let's not use God, it's too contextually loaded already. Let's say that Divine Reality. Or that Ineffable Reality. Is it a reality? Is existing in people's inds and beliefs enough to make it a reality? Is it like love, hope, justice, abstract things swirling and eddying in people's minds that become 'real' as they are given names, as they are given form by these labels? Is that the existence of God (or Divine Reality, Ineffable Presence, Wonder, Transcendence, etc.)? Is talking of the existence of 'God' outside and independent [sic] (yes, we must always correct grammar.:p this is verbatim.:p) of human beings just silly?ö God is, after all, a human name. A name we humans through countless ages gave to that...wondrous, ineffable, transcendent, immanent reality.

Or is it that we only ascribe to this 'reality' things we do not yet understand, or have not yet conquered with our vast scientific accoutrements and rationality? Sure, not we know why volcanoes erupt, really. But who cannot agree to the feeling of wonder we experience, at one point or another? (comment: or am I a deist then?ö) That barest glimpse of eternal realities, out into infinity and within? Of course it is horribly simplistic to take one look at that 'reality' and say, Ah, how great God's creation is. Really, that kind of God has a loaded definition already. (comment: God as creator? God, do I ramble on.XP)

Where was I? Ah. Albert (comment: This would be the Albert whose YouTube videos give a nicely refreshing atheist POV. I'll put the link when I feel like it.XP) does not believe that supernatural beings like God don't exist. Therefore, atheist. Could 'God,' (again, strip it away of its loaded meanings)--as the name humans ascribe to that other reality--exist outside humans' minds, that is, if it is humans who gave the name--and meaning--to it in the first place? (Think Terry Pratchett's gods, who are given existence through people's beliefs. They exist, don't they, but not as 'objectively' as hardcore people would want...(comment: ...or something.:D you get what I mean, it's 00.30 and I'm too laggy to muddle through my thoughts.:p))

I'm certainly not 'simply' a rationalist. I believe humans are rational, but are above reason. So many of the greatest things we do, of the greatest things we become, stem from some driving force that is far more compelling than, and truly over [and] beyond, reason. Where is it that we draw meaning from? Where do we draw answers for our 'why' questions? Reason is not the sole criterion of truth. Reason can't take you to higher planes of being the way music, art, dance, meditation, being 'in the zone' can. (comment: WELL. I know men of science have reportedly been taken to states of rapture through sheer...science.X> and the use of the faculty of reason.:D oh well.:D) Religion (or spirituality, however you want to call it) is, I believe, integral to people and has always been so. (Again, drop the loaded meanings of religion--Christianity, Church, praying to a god, etc.) here and stick with the generics: spirituality, that which binds together one's life, to 'read' one's life, and so forth. (comment: That which gives meaning, I suppose.))

...Aaaaaand that's it.:D And then it was time for me to go lift some weights in a vain effort to put some meat into the dry little sticks I laughingly call my appendages.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Wala lang.:D

2007-05-25T23:29:00.000+08:00

It's a sure sign that you're a dismal failure as a young adult when your mother has a more thriving Friday night life than you.:p Especially when you have absolutely no Friday night life in the first place.:p But! Oh well.:D Life goes on.:D

------

Off to the clinic again tomorrow for a new x-ray.:p Apparently I have an "opacity" in my right lung which smacks suspiciously of TB.:p Would you believe??XP TB??XP I haven't had a cough in ages.o_0 Daddy told me to have a care because he said P&G could just get any other old cum laude. How sad.:<> And there I was thinking that I was the healthiest cum laude.XP Well, at least one of the least sedentary, what the hey? Apparently not.XD (Well. Given that my entire summer regimen has been sleep/oh-maybe-a-little-workout-here-and-there, I'd be one of the most sedentary ones now.:D Like, gloop-congealing-on-the-couch sedentary.:D) OH. And mummy has a theory why I could've gotten it--the quintessential reason she has for everything--dahil sa PUYAT.@_@

...and if it turns out that it was the reason I'm going to go choke myself.:p

------

Dum dee dum dee dum. I should prolly be sleeping now.:D Night night.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

I Chariot!:D

2007-05-09T17:36:00.000+08:00

You are The Chariot

Triumph, Victory, Overcoming Obstacles.

The chariot is one of the most complex cards to define. On its most basic level, it implies war, a struggle, and an eventual, hard-won victory. Either over enemies, obstacles, nature, the beasts inside you, or to just get what you want. But there is a great deal more to it. The charioteer wears emblems of the sun, yet the sign behind this card is the moon. The chariot is all about motion, and yet it is often shown as stationary. It is a union of opposites, like the black and white steeds. They pull in different directions, but must be (and can be!) made to go together in one direction. Control is required over opposing emotions, wants, needs, people, circumstances; bring them together and give them a single direction, your direction. Confidence is also needed and, most especially, motivation. The card can, in fact, indicate new motivation or inspiration, which gets a stagnant situation moving again.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Summer is boring when you're poor.

2007-05-09T17:11:00.000+08:00

...'nuff said.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Widget!:D

2007-03-23T14:07:00.000+08:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

just here to post a visualDNA widget, yippee!:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...and all of it comes smooth as syrup afterwards

2006-10-31T01:55:00.000+08:00

Really, why does one always think up her witty ripostes long after the questions have been asked, long after the horrid, halting mumbles that are sad excuses of answers fade away into oblivion?

I could not tell them "the moves" that caught my heart. Whether there were any "moves" at all is completely beside the point--though I must say I really can't think of one, for the life of me, even now. And maybe there weren't any. Or maybe, even if there were, like a whole lot of them, it was simply because it wasn't "the moves" what caught my heart.

It was you. And I loved you.

And no, I really wasn't looking at a relationship as the grand finale of...whatever it was we were doing. How could I put it in words that would not sound like they were ripped off a cheesy B-movie? This very effort of mine, now, in the way of maybe sort of trying to encapsulate the whole phenomenon into finite, tangible words already diminishes it, compresses it, shoves it into a Tupperware and slices off the edges in a vain effort to make it fit, and all so one can grasp it in one's two hands.

I loved you then. Loved you before I ever fell in love with you.

(Which, as any self-respecting student with at least a C+ in Theology 131 can attest, are entirely different things altogether.)

And how could I not love you? How could I even begin to describe the infinitude that is you, that shall always and forever arrest me? Please don't make me. Allow me to revel in to revel in its ineffable wonder. The stars and the vast expanse of the sky will inevitably lose something on the way to the inside of a Tupperware.

I love you dear. Happy birthday.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Har.XD

2006-08-10T02:56:00.000+08:00

Duuuude. Love these idioms, har.XD

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances, like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E.Coli, and he wasroom-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was theEast River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like asteel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work

.21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around withpower tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...dahil sabaw na utak ko...

2006-08-06T17:11:00.000+08:00

You Should Rule Saturn

Saturn is a mysterious planet that can rarely be seen with the naked eye.

You are perfect to rule Saturn because like its rings, you don't always follow the rules of nature.
And like Saturn, to really be able to understand you, someone delve beyond your appearance.

You are not an easy person to befriend. However, once you enter a friendship, you'll be a friend for life.
You think slowly but deeply. You only gain great understanding after a situation has past.

What Planet Should You Rule?

Your Love Life Secrets Are

Looking back on your life, you will have many true loves.

You've been deeply wounded in the past, and you're still recovering from that hurt.

It's important to you that your lover is very attractive. You like to have someone to show off.

In fights, you are able to walk away and calm down. You are able to weather the storm.

A break-up usually comes as a shock to you. You always think things are going well.

Your Love Life Secrets, Revealed

The Movie Of Your Life Is Film Noir

So what if you're a little nihilistic at times?
Life with meaning is highly over-rated.

Your best movie matches: Sin City, L. A. Confidential, Blade Runner

If Your Life Was a Movie, What Genre Would It Be?

Your Personality Is Like Alcohol

You're the life of the party, a total flirt, and probably a pretty big jokester.
Sometimes your behavior gets you in trouble, but you still remain socially acceptable.
You're a pretty bad driver, and you're dancing could also use a little work!

What Drug Is Your Personality Like?

...err. Pretty bad driver? Shucks, and I don't even know how to drive yet.:P ...and dancing?:p Why, I beg to differ.:P

What Your Face Says

At first glance, people see you as down to earth and reliable.

Overall, your true self is reserved and logical.

With friends, you seem thoughtful and interested in ideas.

In love, you seem mysterious and interesting.

In stressful situations, you seem selfish and moody.

What Do People Think Of Your Face?

You are 93% Virgo

How Virgo Are You?

Your Famous Last Words Will Be:

"So, you're a cannibal."

What Will Your Famous Last Words Be?

Your Lucky Underwear is Green

You're a total go getter who will scrape and crawl to get to the top. And your lucky green underwear will help you get there without a struggle.
A fast learner, you enjoy a good mental challenge - whether it's getting your law degree or running a successful business.

Sometimes you push too hard to succeed, alienating friends and wearing yourself out in the process.
If you want to reach your goals while still maintaining a full life, put on your green underpants. They'll help you slow down and enjoy life.

What Color Is Your Lucky Underwear?

You Are 68% Cynical

You're a full blown cynic... and probably even skeptical of these results.
You have your optimistic moments, but most likely you keep them to yourself.

How Cynical Are You?

Your Deadly Sins

Pride: 80%

Gluttony: 60%

Greed: 60%

Sloth: 60%

Wrath: 60%

Envy: 20%

Lust: 20%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 51%

You will become famous - and subsequently killed by a stalker.

How Sinful Are You?

You Are 80% Boyish and 20% Girlish

You have a tough exterior - and usually a tough interior to match it.
You're no nonsense, logical, and very assertive.
Sometimes you can't understand women at all, even if you're a woman yourself.
You see things rationally, and don't like to let your emotions get the best of you.

How Boyish or Girlish Are You?

You're A Passed Out Drunk

Drinking gives you that warm fuzzy feeling, until you're thrown in the back of a police car...

What Kind of Drunk Are You?

You Are a Boxer Puppy

Energetic, playful and good with kids.
You've also got a wild spirit that can't be trained or tamed.

What Breed of Puppy Are You?

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

.................Shit lang.

2006-08-06T16:03:00.000+08:00

ugh.

hell week. finally. over.XP

..........ugh, it was mortifying.

Damn man, I know I should let bygones be bygones and all that, but ugh. Shitty shit. How mortifying. StratMark I mean. Okay lang siguro sana kung naging tagapindot na lang ako ng powerpoint or something, vis-a-vis being the frontrunner of what could ostensibly called the most blah presentation of the five.XP Sabi nga ni Ingga, parang ginawa lang ng kung sino.X0 Ugh. Mortifying. All the more because my close friends were there man.XP Mortifying. I was so happy seeing Koodei and Dappy there (but at the same time cringing kasi man, how great was our presentation?XP) tapos Koodei goes pa, "Izzy! Galing galing! The best speaker!" and inside I went, ohgod I am mortified.) Ingga and mummy were talking pa daw, sabi ni mummy (upon seeing the other groups' powerpoint) "waw, galing naman niyan, kaya ba ng Ateneo yan?" And Inggy goes, "duh mom, hintayin mo lang yung kay Izzy!"

Ugh. Mortifying.

I could've done so much better man. Audiovisuals are supposed to be my forte.XP As in the whole she-bang.

I wanted to curl up and die.XP

Yes, of course, Ateneo is ironclad strategy-wise. Pero hindi ito strategy contest.XP (tip to the future contestants man.) Sabing dapat tapos na yung strategy one week before pa lang eh.XP

Which brings me to my next bone to pick. And I'm picking this with our beloved dean.XP

At the end of our presentation we trudged back to our assigned locker room, tas marinig-rinig naming umalis na pala si Rudy (didn't bother talking to us na, ganun ba kapangit yung amin?) and then sabi ng isa kong groupmate na medyo ang sablay naman nun, bakit ganun? I was like, hey, whatever, no biggie. But then reflecting upon it after some time, I got to thinking, damn. What the hell?? Is this the kind of leader I want to follow? I was never a SOM person (recently nga lang ako nakatuntong ever sa dean's office) and now it seems my instincts (though I could never articulate them properly) were right. Shit man. Cut your losses na ba 'to?? Walang CSRP! (sorry haha)

And to think! I place upon him the prime responsibility for us not being able to move past the stategy phase.XP Mygod. Walang ginawa kundi gawing pulido nang pulido nang super-dee-duper-di-matira-tira pulido yung strategy, giving us about like two days and an entire night to cram the presentation proper.XP Eh alam na ngang presentation ang habol sa contest man! Nobody gives a shit for the strategy! Tapos at the very end lalaglagin lang kami. If I had put any kind of faith at all in the SOM dept, I would have felt betrayed. Buti na lang.XP

People never seem to learn. Akala ko ba alam na ng lahat (us + the SOM people involved) na presentation over strategy? Tapos strategy pa rin ang coconcentratan ni dear old rudy. Tapos sa end sasabihin nila ulit, ay maganda nga yung strategy ninyo, pero mas maganda presentation nila? Tapos lalaglagin pa kami? Dammit man.

.............................

Eto pa nakakainis. That people seem to think na napakabilis at napakadali lang gumawa ng creatives.XP How the hell can you explain to non-creative people na it actually takes time and a goodly amount of brain cells to come up with creative things?? At one point last week I actually wanted to cry na out of frustration. Chalk it up to no sleep and frazzled nerves. Bah.

.............................

Philo presentation. Isa pang ugh. I felt like a show horse. My fault, of course, for agreeing in the first place.XP But I could've at least put my foot down on what I would actually do. Damn you , people-pleasing Izzy. Show some backbone.

.............................

Hay. Wala lang. My Php0.02. It's just that this entire week has left a sour taste in my mouth. It created an all-time low in my roster of hell weeks. All the more so because I didn't feel like I delivered at all in any of my deliverables, all of which I lost a goodly amount of sleep and training over.

.............................

And why have you become so infuriatingly obnoxious??

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Revelation No. 46

2006-07-30T01:30:00.000+08:00

...I believe I may just have stumbled upon something.

A revelation of sorts.

I present several facts for your consideration:

1. I mope and fuse into the bed when I don't have anything to do (...something which started to make itself manifest as early as my gradeschool years. Summer vacation, oh what a quandary.)

2. After which I start praying for something to do. (Ironic, since I fancy myself a Lazy Ass.)

3. I get really irritated when I feel that my time is wasting away, dribbling into nothingness when I could've been spending it being productive. Like oh.
a. Being forced to walk really slowly along the nature walk because some friggin' farts decided they were swapped at birth with garden snails, goddaym it man!
b. Being stuck at meetings that seem to want to test just how infinite old Father Time can stretch his poor-ass beard, and where nothing gets done anyway and everyone just sits around blabbering
c. This is all actually a bit of a hypocrisy because I have this particularly resilient habit of rolling around my bed for hours on end doing absolutely nothing at all. Harharhar.

4. When a whole day goes by and I didn't do squat, I go to bed feeling very unfulfilled and unproductive.

5. When a whole day goes by and I did do diddly, I go to bed feeling plump and pleasant.

6. I'm juggling A LOT of things right now. Wait, lemme say that again: A LOT OF THINGS.

7. I feel sorta kinda pumped. Motivated. Frazzled, yes. But more...alive.

Thus.

Conclusion #1: I get pumped when I have a lot of things to do.
Conclusion # 2: The more things I have to do, the more pumped I get.

....and

The Greatest Conclusion Of Them All:
OhMyGod I Am A Workaholic.

Lordy. This clashes mighty heavily with my weltanschauung. Because. I have apparently been laboring under the delusion that I was Lazy-Ass Bum Personified.

.....................ohmygyaaaaaaaaaaad.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Walang Pasok! Whoo!

2006-07-23T23:31:00.000+08:00

No Classes tomorrow!:D Huzzah!:D

Hmmm. Pero parang wala pa akong nagagawang homework whatsoever. Lalo na for tuesday. Ay shet may long test pala sa polsci sa thursday, hahaha. And all my stuff are back at the condo pa.:s Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

......................

Had my hair cut last week. No biggie, it looks exactly like my old hair, only...shorter.XD Hawhaw.

Had my left eye checked yesterday. Apparently the cells of my cornea had been summarily sloughed off (thus exposing the nerve underneath) by, oh, me rubbing my eye with my contacts still on. Haw. Good lesson for All Ye Bearers of Contact Lens.:D It hurt like a little bitty piece of shit.XP But now is okay, since those cornea cells apparently regenerate veeeeeeeery quickly. And on their own too, the dependable little dears.:D

.....................

Flipped through a magazine (forgot which) while I was getting my hair cut. Shet ang ganda ni Heart.:P The boy in me says, "shet ganda ni Heart!" The girl in me says, "shet bat ang ganda ni Heart??!"

.....................

Ang sarap matulog sa ulan.:D ........errrrrrrr I don't mean sa ulan sa ilalim mismo ng ulan na tipong nauulanan ka and stuff. Pero pwede rin.

.....................

Went to a gay stand-up comedy bar. Hawhawhaw sobrang funny.XP Discovered I had unprecedented levels of crassness (bentang benta lahat ng jokes which would've made some people wither and die). Harharhar! Sobrang funny!XD HAHAHA! Limang garapon! Hahaha! (okay now that part konti lang makakagets.:D) Panalo talaga!XD Balik tayo mga kids!:D

.....................

Humdeehum. Mummy made Inggy and me midnight snacky sandwiches.:DDD And coffee.:DDD Love.:DDD I love it here sa house.:DDD Wheeeeeeeeee.

.....................

Seven............days............... Seven..........days...................!! Seven daaaaaaaaaaaaaays and someone will be back here in my arms.:DDDDDDDDDDDDD (technically. Eight days pala. Dahil nasa immersion pa ko.:p Farmers! Whooooooooo!:D)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

........Quandary!

2006-07-19T02:02:00.000+08:00

B or A? A or B? Oh, what a quandary.XP Why is one at the expense of another??XP Can't I exercise my right to Selfishness Personified and have both for my very own??XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

No Classes! Yippee!

2006-07-12T22:48:00.000+08:00

...WALANG PASOK BUKAS!!:DD huzzah!

And! I heard a rumor. ........na walang pasok din sa Friday! Yippee!XD

Kaso. It feels kinda queer na biglang walang kelangan gawin.o_0 Here we go again, hohoho. Oh, whattodowhattodowhattodo.XD

Nakakatuwa ang mga estudyante kanina nung inannounce na walang pasok sa PA. Ika nga ni Kevin, parang si Big Brother. Hawhawhaw. Pero nakakatuwa ang kanilang collective cries of joy.:D

..............

I kinda miss Singapore. Wala lang.:s Somehow iba ang Way of Life dun na weird. Pero nakakamiss.:s

..............

......I'm hungry.:s

Watched Pirates of the Carribean!:DDD Err. I suppose I'm not allowed to spoil anybody.XP Pero. Can I just say. (shut your eyes!) Nabitin ako nang husto.XP Ohwell.XD ...Pero in fairness, nakarelate ako.XP

.........Er. A little ipis just went walking by.o_0 Errrr.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...It's 0216.:D

2006-07-08T01:54:00.000+08:00

Hmm. How queer. I know I have a relatively lighter load this year in terms of extra-curricular commitments, not to mention 'di na SMEG sem (pero sabagay hebigat talaga 'tong 4th year 1st sem, but oh come on, 3rd pa lang...!XP) but somehow.:o 3rd week pa lang and I'm already calling up the energy reserves that I didn't know I had from the innermost recesses of god-knows-where.o_0 Hohoho. Haven't been to training or to the gym at all this week.XP Bleh. I will definitely go Moro tomorroh.:D (hohoho.) I swear I lose muscles by the bucket if I stop training for even a week.XP Grrrr. How am I ever going to attain supreme levels of buff-ness at this rate?o_0 Hohoho. And to think! Mas nakakapag-gym pa ko sa Singapore, and super gabi pa at that. Hmmmm. Come to think of it, nakakayanan ko yung ganung klaseng sched (wake up at 8.00, gumulong gulong sa kama, bangon at 8.45, go to work at 9.10, arrive at 10, go home at 6-7, gym at 8, dinner at 11, tambay/internet/nood TV hanggang 1/2/3, tulog, wake up at 8.00...) but now.o_0 Hum. School is so much more tiring than work.XP

Hohoho. I remember quite vividly while I was in Singapore na I grumbled a bit na ayoko nang bumalik sa school, primarily because it's so darn unlucrative!XP (wahaha I got drunk with money, moneymoneymoneymoooooneeeeeeeeey!XDDD) Plus. I somehow got the thought stuck to my craw na lahat ng pinag-aaralan at ginagawa sa school ay senseless when you go out into the real world and do real work and stuff. As in, all that theo/philo/ls/chuvaness will fade away into the winds and will leave you wondering, "...eyng? huh?"

But here and now, back in school, I'm thinking, what the hey. School's great!:D I've been given a new lease in...uh...school.o_0 (How lame.o_0) College is great!:D There's nothing quite like it in the world. You get to be an adult and not-so-much-of-an-adult at the same time. Ohshit I feel so old.X0 Like seriously. I haven't gotten it into my head that I'M AN EFFING SENIOR just yet.XP In less than a year, why, I'll be going out into the world to make me fortune, aye! (wow parang ang layo ng pupuntahan ko, hahaha.) It's not really that big of a transition, actually, but maybe it is. (ooooooookay that didn't make sense.XP But it's 2.00 in the morning and I have all the right in the world not to make sense.:P)

Errr. Do I have a point here?o_0 Oh, Theo 141 is great.:D Couple that with CSR (uy biglang naging active sa org!XP), Philo 104, and a coupla other things that I know are there but I just can't remember at the moment because the Extra Joss still hasn't fully kicked in yet) and you finally get the feeling that hey, I can finally quit with all this oh-I-feel-depressed-all-the-time thingamajigger that's apparently been plaguing me for the past x months (just take a sweeping glance at my blog! It's so sad!XP) Because!:D It's high time to stop moping and groping about very self-centered issues.:D Why, the world does not revolve around me!:D (well, sure it does, but you get my point.:D)

Hmmm. In the wee hours of the night is perhaps where I can finally get closer to Ye Grande Purpose.:D Biglang nag-pop sa mind ko na lang tuloy yung memory when we were going back home from S'pore. Sobrang ganda ng view from the plane when you look down on the wee little islands of the Philippines. Wala lang. I'm trying to get my brain to wax philosophical at this point but. It's. Giving. .............uuuuuUp.XD Shit.:D

Ohyougetthepoint.:D Kunwari na lang I ended this entry by saying something really witty and deep.:DDD Thankyooooooooooooooo.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

....:D

2006-07-08T01:37:00.000+08:00

...Malapit nang mag-end ang week...!XD Oh joy.:D I am tired.XD OR killed me kanina. BUT. I am Buddha. I am desireless.:D Hence I have attained Nirvana, and I am happeeeeeeeeeeee.:DDD

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...hello!:D

2006-06-28T01:31:00.000+08:00

Wow, 7 episodes of Full Metal Alchemist downloaded by Inggy!:D Yay!:D (wala nang tulugan to!:D All pretense of studying, away!:D) Hanggang episode 24. No spoilers please. Or else I will KILL.:p

Wheee, biglang gumaan load ng week ko!:D hohoho. What fun. (I may have spoken too soon, but! Kahit na!:D) Considerably lighter than the past coupla days.:D

Oh. Tournament pala last weekend.:D Yaaaay. 'Di nga lang ako pwedeng mag-anyo. Hummmf. Ganda pa naman sana nung bagong espada y daga form ni sir ry, but ohwell!:D

Hum dee hum. La dee dah.:D Wala lang.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hungry.:s

2006-06-24T21:42:00.000+08:00

Um. I'm hungry.:o Waiting for daddy to pick me up.:D AND. Wala pala akong pera sa wallet, HAHAHA. Anlakas ng apog kong mag-internet.XD

Er. Fiddled around with my grades. Humpf. Ayoko nang mawindang sa graaaaaaaaaaades.X0 Ngunit. It seems that I must make career of my final year to graduate nicely. Pero. Kung hinde. Eh di hinde.XD

Puchang ina may nagyoyosi ditoooohh???X0 Gurrrrrrrr.

Huuuuuuungry.:s

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Here in the darkness

2006-06-24T03:15:00.000+08:00

There is much that can be learned here in the darkness, in this still, silent limbo called night. Here in the darkness most everything that seems important in the light of day fades into the shadows that border on nothingness. Chasing grades, graduating with honors, money, success, prestige, getting to join a competition, the esteem of the world. All that jazz. And one is happily left with, seemingly, nothing. Except for, maybe, the purpose of finding a purpose in life.

Maybe I'm just weird. Or I think too much. Surely, life would be altogether more pleasant, not to mention ridiculously easier, if I were to traipse merrily along down the road where we are all inevitably pointed towards. Live, breathe, die. School, career, family, kids. And so forth. Somehow I haven't been able to stop this spiel from rolling over and over again in my head. What is the purpose of life? Seems like I haven't gotten anywhere near to answering that question since it first made a troublesome bother of itself some blinking years ago. Well. I suppose I could think of it as a good thing. If and when I reach the end of that road and finally find the answer to all life's questions, that would be exactly what it is: the end of the road. So I could actually call all this endless questioning: living.

And so I question again. Here in the darkness where all melts away, and all the seemingly shiny things that looked so pretty in the daytime have no light of their own after all. Shit. Fuck. Where am I? Where do I go? And even if I did go there, where is there? And what's so damn good about it?

Sometime around two, three years ago I hung my search for answers of the beyond-temporal kind on a hook somewhere as I plunged entirely into the material world of, well, the world. And all was good, for a time. In the daytime, if I kept moving fast enough, all those questions would not be able to catch up with me. All that glaring emptiness. Move, move, move.

Here in the darkness all is still and silent. And the mind is left to wander free to ponder that cheesy question: What is the purpose of my life? If only it were as easy as taking up a random miscellanous faith and believing it on command. God = purpose? But even the wonder of the infinite, of that certain ineffable something, stirs no purpose in me. Not now, perhaps. Now, I merely ramble and shamble along. Hoping I end up somewhere. Anywhere. Nowhere.

All the seemingly purposeful designs of my daytime life are put to the test here at night. Perhaps that is why it is so difficult to get up in the morning. Upon awakening all is still dark and silent, and stirring against it requires the effort that only purpose can muster. To be sure, once one is up and about and touched by the rays of the morning, it is relatively easy to get moving again. Move, move, move. One little goal at a time. Makes things easier than to look upon that endless horizon, that vast expanse of dark, empty space. And yet it beckons. Surely there is some great mystery to be unraveled, waiting for us when we fall into the sky.

Geez, I must sound really depressed. But who cannot help but be so in the still darkness of the night, when the bounds of the universe become smaller than the four walls of one's room? But I can only ramble. In the here and the now I cannot resolve anything just yet. This is not, I am afraid, some grand exposition where I suddenly, magnificently, essay to tie every random thing I threw into the bubbling slew of my head into a neat little lump of whatsit. But perhaps there is tidbit or two to be gained, a mote of light--or dust?--that illuminates the tiniest of space. Perhaps my head is a bit clearer.

Oh, happy delusion.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Le sigh.

2006-06-03T19:38:00.000+08:00

A very idyllic Saturday. I slept for 16 hours, hohoho. I feel like a polar bear (hihihi it's an intern joke. An intern-al joke, get it??XD Hwahwahwahwa!XD) even if it's Saturday. Final presentation on Tuesday. That's, like, 3 days from now.

........

OMFG IT'S THREE EFFING DAYS FROM NOW!!ööö

Hahaha. Must. Work. Must. Work.

I shan't complain or anything though. All this "ang hirap ng work ko," "di, mas mahirap work ko!", "suerte ka nga eh, yung akin..." gets kinda old after some time.:p

So. Para matapos na. I blithely declare.

I have the easiest project of 'em all.:p

* * * * *

Hmmm. Biglang may tournament pala June 23-25. Shet.X0 Ohno. Cram training is what it is.XP Yaaaaah.

If I could describe my life right now, I'd just draw a blank. No, literally. Life then becomes much easier when you take it one day at a time, and take no notice at all of that wide glaring chasm of despair and doom and endlessness that is the rest of my life.XP Plod along. Plod along. Life's not worth living 'til you're actually living. And I'm not living right now.XP

Hmmm. Will this corporate world work with me, I wonder?o_0 Lalo na if by some cosmic joke P&G actually offers me work here pa in Singapore. Trundle along. Trundle along.

Lovely harp music here. What I wouldn't give just to let myself float away to the sounds of strings and woodwinds. Violins. Harps. Flutes. Float away. Float away.

If anybody has got a terrific idea on what could actually make life life, look me up please. In the meantime I shall be plodding along. Trundling along. Floating away. One day at a time.

............

Oh dear. I told myself I was going to make a happy blog entry this time.XP Oh well.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

.....

2006-06-01T23:19:00.000+08:00

hmmm. you know what. almost all my blog entries whine about Ye Same Ole Drivel. hihihi. I guess I don't really feel comfortable ranting to anybody (kasi medyo dapat self-sufficient nga ako 'di ba wahahaha. Hmmm. San nanggaling yun?:D) so dito ko nalang naibubuhos. Hmmm. Kaso. Nagmumukha naman akong Bitter Person. Which I'm not, why, I'm the Avatar of Cheer!:D Hihihi.

Hmmmm. SHET. YUNG PRESENTATION KO BUKAAAAAAAAS. Grabehhh.XD Hahaha.

Errrrr. Off I go?:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...shet.

2006-06-01T22:39:00.000+08:00

Um. Shet. Presentation na bukas sa boss ko at. 'Di pa ko tapos. As in. Grabe. At. Nagbblog pa ko ngayon.XD Hahaha.

And my true nature rises to the surface (and to the task). Hay. Mukhang 'di ko na talaga matatakasan ang aking crammer ways.XP Parang si Michael Corleone, in the end kahit anong pacute Sicilian Mafia pa rin through and through. Grabeh.

Um. Malapit na magpasukan. At. Shet. Kailangan kong galingan. Sinong nagsabi? Ako. Shet. Ayoko nang mag-aral.XP

Jack of all trades. Master of none. Yun na lang.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...:D

2006-05-29T23:51:00.000+08:00

Cold water. Cold water. Cold water has been dumped nicely down my back. ....hoooo. I am now nicely sober again.

No need for S.T.A.S.H. no more.

Hihihihi.

Um. I am down in the dumps. (and that is when I am most giddy. hence.) Dumps. Dumps. Dumpted. Dumpster. Dumpy. Dumpty.

Oh, the mudanity that is life. The purposelessness that is life.XP I don't want to go back to school to toil and slave to get my piece of Ye Ole Posterity Pie. Le Sigh.

I. Am. Fed. Up. I. Am. Tired. I. Want. A. Vacation. Even if I have to take that damned vacation BY MYSELF, ohfuckity.

HEY. Great idea!:DDD Hmmmm. Why don't I?:DDD Hrmmmmm. Like I could just duck out into a hotel somewhere over the weekend while I'm still rich.:DDDD HMM! Idea is what this is!:DDD

...Hm! Great! Now I have a nice little short-term goal to look forward to so I can take my eyes off the glaring emptiness that is my future.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

....

2006-05-29T00:14:00.000+08:00

i. cry. i don't know why.

oh hell. i know why.

am i emotional? noiamfuckingnot. it's not that hormonal time of the month.

i. cry.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Grmpfwibble.

2006-05-28T22:46:00.000+08:00

um. hello. i am so bored stiff. so. i shall keep trundling along and filling this blog with the same old drivel.XP

SHITFUCKDAMMIT, why oh WHYYY is it that men get to be stronger than women?? (physically, I mean. Really, is there anywhere else they're stronger in?:p ...okaymuststopintensefemalechauvinistictendenciesNOW.XD) GRRRAARRRUMMPF. Uh. Pasensya. Hihihi. I never like getting beaten in anything, even it if it's a battle that's obviously the Avatar of the Lostest of Lost Battles.XP Arrrrgh. Grmpfwibble.

I wonder if I should work on my, er, work.o_0 Hmmmm.

I'm not that bored yet.:s

Watched The Godfather Parts 1 and 2.ö .....steeeeeeeg.ö Masyado silang tigas.ö Pero. Malungkot pa rin.:s Hm. Kung siguro dati ko napanood isa lang talaga naisip ko: TIGAAAAS. Ngunit. Subalit. Datapwat.ö

Grmpfwibble. Binarbero ko na lang yung interview thingy para sa Business World. Hmmm. Hmmm. Tapos sobrang late ko pa binigay, hohoho.XD Ilalagat pa kaya nila yun? Hmmm. Napakapasaway pa naman nung mga iba kong sinulat, kasi sobrang inaantok na ko.XD Oh well.XD

...hum. whattodowhattodowhattodo.:s

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

hum.

2006-05-28T22:32:00.000+08:00

ummmm. wala lang. uh.

S.T.A.S.H.

That is the thing to bear in mind.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

oh dear.

2006-05-28T04:16:00.000+08:00

oh me oh my. I think I made lustay Php6K. Mahal ang call back home (wow Izzy, you think?). Hihihihi. Ohwell. Mayaman pa naman ako.XD Hihihihi. Sorry mum & dad.:D I pay when I balik. Shit, 6k.XD Hohohoho. But is okay.:D

Mwah.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Solid proof that I do not do any such thing as work.:D

2006-05-24T12:38:00.000+08:00

...and I'm supposed to be working.:D

You Would Pick Your Boyfriend Again!

While the initial new couple spark has faded for you two,
You've built upon your attraction - and formed a deep love.
And although things are never perfect, they're usually pretty great.
So don't let your eye wander. You've got the best catch for you, at home.

Would You Pick Him Again?

Awww! They're so sweet!

....Shit! This sucks majorly! I'm all alone with a big lonely bed here in quiet lonely Singapore!XP ...ohwell. Must suck it up now.:D

You Are Bad Girl Sexy

Girl, you are nothing but trouble. And that's hot.
You've got the classic bad girl sexiness mojo going on.
And your badass attitude makes men fear you - and crave you.
Don't give into people who say to tone it down. You're perfect as is.

What Kind of Sexy Are You?

Uh. I don't think I got this blogthing quite right.o_0 ...Bad Girl Sexy???o_0

You are Sneakers!

You're an active girl, who's all about function
You dress for the occasion - comfort comes first
Your perfect guy? Someone who can keep up with you.
You'll find him - but you might have to slow down to see him!

What Kind of Shoe Are You?

Errr. I was sort of trying to go for heels.o_0 Oh well.:D

Start Hunting For That New Apartment

You two are ready to live together - and probably have been for a while
You're a perfect match, even if you don't agree on everything
What's important is compromise... a skill you and your guy have mastered
So head out to Bed, Bath, and Beyond. It's time for your new life together!

Should You Live Together?

...cool.:D

Your Ideal Hairstyle:

Sexy Waves

What Hairstyle Is Right For You?

Hmmm. Getting there, getting there...:D

He is a Man

You have yourself a perfect gentleman and a total keeper
Your guy almost always acts appropriately
He's probably even very upstanding when you're not around
There's no boy left in your boyfriend - he's all man!

Is He A Boy or a Man?

...Never a doubt in me head dear.:D

You Are 28% Girly

You are a pretty hardcore tomboy, and a very free spirit.
Gender roles be dammed, you like to do things your way.

How Girly Are You?

Hahaha. Whoo!:D

Men See You As Choosy

Men notice you light years before you notice them
You take a selective approach to dating, and you can afford to be picky
You aren't looking for a quick flirt - but a memorable encounter
It may take men a while to ask you out, but it's worth the wait

How Do Men See You?

...shit. I am so not doing work.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...Shit.

2006-05-24T11:49:00.000+08:00

SHIT. SHI-effing-IT.XP

(Just got my grades is what I meant to say.)

Fuck. I'm such a loser.XP First-class all the way, whoooo.

Harrumpf. Kaya ko pa kayang gumawa ng himala't hilain 'to all the way up there back to cum laude again?:s MyGod, I do so suck. Why can't I be magaling math-y things??:p Bleh.

Ohwell. A miniscule blow to my [fragile] ego. Argh. But. There is so much more to life than grades. And I, who have expressed such potent and vehement disregard for the worth of grades in general--particularly when attached to a person's worth--should actually stop being a hypocrite and start walking the walk I'm...er....talking.o_0 ANYHOW.

Shet. I want ice cream. 7/11 so far away. (six minute walk. I'm tamad.)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

The Lion City sleeps. I apparently don't. All's right in the world.

2006-05-24T05:29:00.000+08:00

Hum. It has just occurred to me. I think I completely forgot the past two monthsaries April & May.XDDD Um. Um. Let's see. That is because. We've hit the one-year mark!:D Huzzah.:DDD

Mrrr. It is 0527 hours (an ungodly 0427 in the real world, as Singapore is a staunch believer that belief in something (like, say, oh, it's 5 oh'clock [sic, yes I know, hon, what, you think I suck at spelling or something?:p] and a half even when the sun's not fricking there yet, it's like me saying oh-my-god-am-I-good-in-uhhh-math-or-what and suddenly acing my Calculus, which never happened, not in every possible alternate reality) actually makes that something real (even if the sun is so not there yet, really. Anyway.:D)

...er. What was I saying?:D

Anyway. I've got a bit of insomnia. (I wonder how I managed that.) Hrumpf. Dum dee dum. Blah dee blah.XP It's getting to be pretty boring here in no time at all. The novelty is wearing off.:p (though the apartment is still goooood.:D) The days melt nicely into nights and back again and forth again and back again. The kids are great. Though. I have to say there isn't exactly a whole roaring plethora of choice conversation picks. (basically it boils down to Choice A: work, Choice B: work, Choice C: work, Choice D: what the hey, let's talk about school! (as if that wasn't horribly boring enough to talk about in school), Choice E: aaaand work again!, & Choice F: niceties about the minutiae of thism-thatms. Hmmm. 6 choices! Not bad, after all, what they hey.:p) Not to mention I have to make like the Singaporean equivalent of the MTRCB and screen the R21's (astig, may R21 pala dito!:D Plus the blurbs on the Lie With Me movie poster are weird.o_0 They veer from the traditional "Sexy!", "Great!", "Utterly devious, scintillating!" and other such normal ambiguous drivel straight to "This film is really for adults only!" and I go like, wow, you think??) from the conversation for the kiddies.:p Le hay.

Oh well. I am simply salat is what I am. (And a catty beetch. Though I screen myself pretty heavily because I happen to be a catty beetch with a catty conscience, and it's positively horrid. Grmfpwibble.) I think at one point I was actually going to blog to cat-bitch about work and the fact that what they hey, I may or may not have the most ridiculously easy marketing project of all, but that doesn't mean I'm any less good than I actually am, which is pretty damn good, but that line of thinking just shows how far gone I am into the realm of one-dimension-ness where work and work alone reigns supreme. Not to mention the fact that deep down I'm just horribly insecure that I ain't all that so I feel compelled to defend every put-down thrown my way, both big and small, real and imagined.:D So what's new.:D Shee-yite. I am le bored.

Le bored.

Le bored.

Hum. It's 0550, a time when the sun is normally up and about already. But oh, look at that! At what? Nothing at all! Because it is still pitch fricking black outside.:D Grmf. Swimming kaya ako.:D Hum. Work from home kaya ako today.:D So that I may lounge around and watch TV and not have to wear heels (which make me grow horrid calluses in the wrong places, mind. They're right in the middle and they feel weird when I walk barefoot. Yick.) and sit around in the ghost town they call an office.o_0 Hum. I am hungry. I believe I shall get a bit of morning snackage.:D Er. So. Apparently I didn't sleep a wink.o_0 Insomnia, ohyes.

I miss you to bits dear. (kahit 'di mo nirereplyan text ko.:s) 'Di kita mahagilap sa ym, harrumpf. Oh well. Shall I bare my vulnerable innermost soul and say at length--at the risk of sounding like an utterly pathetic idiot--how much I. Miss. You. To. Bits. Miss. You. To. Bits. Miss. You. Miss. You. Miss. You. Horribly. Really., or shall I keep up this nice little facade of Tough Little Me? Ah, but I am Tough in all other Aspects in life save You. Argh. Atrociously horrid vulnerability right there.:D Ohwell.

Shyite, I am hunger. (yet another vulnerability of the more prosaic kind.:D) I believe I shall answer to the whims of my physical body, to which I am utterly powerless to resist. Because. I. Am. Hung-fricking-ry.:D

Anaknamputsangkalawang Nagulat Akoh sa biglang radyo dito sa business center.o_0 Grmpfwibble.

But. I am hunger.:D Bye-oooooo.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hum.

2006-05-23T17:41:00.000+08:00

Well. It's been a while.:D

It's one of those chronic once-you-start-stopping-to-blog-you-go-on-stopping-blogging kind of things.:D Hum.

Well. 5 weeks down here in Singapore and gee, time flies really fast [when you're having fun XP]. I think we must've exhausted the major tourist-y spots here in the first three weeks, so now we're down to trundling around to these-and-them night spots (and believe you me, there's about enough to fill a weensy little teacup the size of weensy little Singapore.XP). But is okay.:D

"Hi. - Jaryd" >> may nagpapacute.:p

Actually, a nice and staid little life isn't so bad. It's no fun anyway here if you try to do it without the right people.:p The Indian interns are all whoooo, party-party-party-bar-bar-bar, but somehow it doesn't even prick my interest.:p Hoooo, bata.:p I am content with ice cream in the wee hours of the morning, thankyouverymuch.:D

Grmf. Work has hit a bit of a rut.XP I was kind of on a roll the past month so sealing away the nasty, potentially emotional bits of my personal life in cryogenic freeze was easy 'nuff.:D But now.:D I. Am. Happily. Not. Doing. ANYTHING.:DDD Wheeeee.:D

--hrmf. Must be off in a wee bit. LT dinner thingamajig. Bye-ooo.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hum dee hum.

2006-03-17T01:03:00.000+08:00

one more week and everything's over. ...ö

...and I get that tiny little nagging feeling at the back of my mind again.

that somehow, when I'm not chug-a-lugging Red Bull/Lipovitan/Bacchus (which really SUCKS, as I may already have mentioned :D), juggling x projects/papers/deadlines at the same time with x inversely proportional to t, time allotted, I can't escape that tiny, empty feeling.

Right now I'm not really doing anything. Well, I should be doing something, but it isn't something I can't cram until later. So in short, I'm a bit relaxed, if you can call it that. A breather in the hectic, repetitive, meaningless little life of me. Too relaxed that thoughts have too much space in my head to bounce around and echo into a silent cacophony, nagging, nagging, nagging.

...it's too quiet.

there is nothing to do. nothing to occupy the time of this anonymous little drone so she can stop entertaining a myriad little thoughts.

mundane. mundane. mundane.

boring. boring. boring.

hum dee hum. there must be SOMETHING to look forward to.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Last na talaga 'to!

2006-03-07T00:14:00.000+08:00

He's a Keeper!

Your guy is a rare find: sweet, kind, and loyal.
And as long as he doesn't have three nippples,
You should seriously consider keeping him a long time

Sometimes a girl can't see a good thing when she's got one
So let me tell you: your guy is a gold medal boyfriend
Just make sure you treat him right in return!

Is He a Keeper?

THAT'S better.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

More Procrastinating.:D

2006-03-06T23:55:00.000+08:00

You Are Furry Boots

They're not just boots. They're your dancing shoes!

What Kind of Boots Are You?

...yummy!ööö

You Are Independent Sexy

You drive men crazy with your "playing hard to get act"
Except, it's really not an act at all.
You're a strong, sexy woman with her own life and interests.
And that makes men even more interested in you!

What Kind of Sexy Are You?

You are a Great Girlfriend

When it comes to your guy, you're very thoughtful
But you also haven't stopped thinking of yourself
You're the perfect blend of independent and caring
You're a total catch - make sure your guy knows it too!

Are You a Good Girlfriend?

dear o...:D

You Are Funky Panties

You're stylish, trendy, but not over the top.
You know how to look good - without looking like you're trying too hard.
Men think that you're cute, friendly, and approachable.
And you've got a spunky, feisty side that comes out after a while!

What Kind of Panties Are You?

SHET. ang sexy niya.ö i feel horribly flabby.XP i LIKE those panties, though.:D

Your Relationship Will Last... A Long Time!

This may be hard for you to swallow, but you and your guy might not last
At least not forever. He's somewhere between Mr. Right... and Mr. Right Now
No doubt your guy is a great catch - and generally good to you
The odds are, however, that someone better is out there!

How Long Will Your Relationship Last?

noooooooooo.:P what does a blogthing know anyway?XP (although tama naman the one about the boots and everything else:D) in fact, why am I even putting it up here?XP (I dunno.:D)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

WELL.ö

2006-03-06T23:53:00.000+08:00

You Will Be an Unconventional Bride!

You're probably the type of girl who never considered getting married - until you met *him*
You're not a big fan of white dresses, church weddings, or cheesy DJ's
That's okay - you'll do it your way... whether that means a Vegas wedding or guys as bridesmen
While you may not toss the bouquet (or have anyone to toss it to), it will still be the most romantic day of your life!

What Kind of Bride Will You Be?

ohmy.ö Well, THAT settles it then.:D (uh-huh, and 'Twas a blogthing what opened my eyes.o_0)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Because I am procrastinating.:D

2006-03-06T23:48:00.000+08:00

You Are A Woman!

Congratulations, you've made it to adulthood.
You're emotionally mature, responsible, and unlikely to act out.
You accept that life is hard - and do your best to keep things upbeat.
This makes you the perfect girlfriend... or even wife!

Are You A Girl Or a Woman?

Imma perfect wife!ööö

...well, it doesn't seem so bad after all.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Is it ME?ö Is it really MEEEE?ö

2006-03-06T21:57:00.000+08:00

...wow.

I am actually in my blog.ö (gasp)

...Such novelty!ööö

Nice to have some novelty before I DIE.XP (Persona A: Ah, I see your flair for the dramatic has not been diminished by time, Izzy. Persona B: Oh yes, quite, quite.)

MyGOD. Almost two (or is it three now?ö) straight weeks of running on an average of three hours of sleep and judicious amounts of Lipovitan/Red Bull/Bacchus (Bacchus sucks, btw. It made me drop right to sleep.:P HUMF.) is KILLING me.X0 My mental faculties have become sluggisher and sluggisher. ...No, wait, I think they've finally stopped.o_0 How sad.

I have discovered that I take naturally to Marketing as a fish to a pond. Well, at least when I have my complete set of mental cogs anyway.:P Unfortunately, Marketing 101 is KILLING me.XP Being both editor AND artist takes rather a toll on the brain juices.:P Creating ideas (as opposed to moving nice little numbers around) is not so madali, thankyouverymuch.:P

Oh well. Yun lang. It is OVAH.

Now I must move on, as I have 6+ philosophical reviews to make before Thursday. OMFG. Wait, that didn't cut it. OHMYFUCKINGGYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD.

LORD. I should like to DIE right now. NO WAIT. I actually don't want to die right now, thankyew. Figure of speech, you see.:D Shet, kanina nga when I was falling asleep I had this totally scary sensation of my chest closing in and I couldn't draw breaths anymore I felt like I was FUCKING DYING.ööö Scary shyeeeeeeeeet mehn. 'Di ko lam kung bangag o antok o wasted lang ako or if I was simply teetering across the border of sleep and consciousness but it felt so REAL (ilang beses pa nga nangyari kasi I was testing kung one-time thing lang siya.ö But NO. Everytime I would *almost* fall asleep I'd feel that HORRIBLE HORRIBLE feeling.X0

OHWELL again.:P My chest hurts. Well, twinges lang naman.:P NO MORE RED BULL FOR YOU IZZY.:P BAAAAAAAAAAAAD.

I HATE not being able to train and go to the gym.X0 I feel horrible, wretched, maputla, unfulfilled.XP Kanina when I dropped by training it was almost like a physical ache when I saw the people in reds sa Covcorts mula sa malayo. (cheesy?:P ohwell.:P) WAAAAAAAAAAH.

I do not like this lifestyle at all.:P I am never going to compromise my other priorities like this when I get to work.:P (well, I'll try my darnedest not to anyway.XP) But if work turns out to be like this, I'm going to hafta go look for another one.XP SO THERE.XP

ACTUALLY, nagpprocrastinate lang ako dahil may lecheng theo paper pa akong kailangang gawin na DUE BUKAS OMFG.ö 10 EFFING PAGES OMFG.öö Not to mention those stupid banes of my existence, those HORRRRRR-rible philo reviews!XP WAAAAAAAAAAAH. Die. Die. Die.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hay. New Year.

2006-01-08T13:52:00.000+08:00

...right, New Year's Resolutions.:P Forgot about those.:P And in true cramming spirit, ngayon ko lang sila gagawin.

Ehem.

(Late) New Year's Resolutions 2006
by Izzy

1. Never cram again. (when projects include video editing.:P)
2. Be horribly buff.:D
3. Do all that tumbling around stuff. Which I hadn't gotten around to at all last year.
4. Create at least 3 pieces of what may be called, in the loosest possible terms, art.XP (Kung 'di kaya, fine 2 na lang.XD)
5. Save Php700 minimum every week. (a resolution I broke the past first week.XP Way to go.XP)
6. Maintain very tenuous cum laude standing.
7. Must. Buy. Respectable. Corporate Outfits.
8. Find (and buy!) the perfect pair of shoes. (sexy black, strappy white, versatile all-around, etc etc, and all of them should be heels! Must! Wear! Heels!)
9. Get a life. I swear I don't have a life anymore.

Lately I've been feeling so unutterably lost.XP Not a good way to start the year.XP Hayayay. Oh well. I'm meandering purposelessly through life again!X0 Not good, so not good.

I am hungry. Isn't there anything to eat in this house?X0

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Haaaaaaah.

2005-12-29T23:06:00.000+08:00

I. Am. Happy.

contented sigh.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Booooooooooored.

2005-12-20T07:43:00.000+08:00

I'm bored. Dreadfully bored. The tedium of everyday mundanity bores me overly.

Is there nothing else?

-----------
Is there no one else? - Achilles

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Stream of Consciousness.

2005-12-12T00:21:00.000+08:00

Only a wee wee bit more to go and I will have finally chucked my why-the-geddem-hell-am-I-not-super-smart bullshittiness.XD Only a wee wee bit more...!

Geddemit all to hell. I am waltzing happily down the spiralling trail of mediocrity.X0 Is that a good thing? Is that a bad thing? I seem to be happy enough where I am now.:o No more stressing about stupid grades and all that overachieving hullaballoo that won't amount to anything anyway. Bleh. Well. Overachieving in the management engineering department anyway. Bleh. I swear, all this management stuff is B-O-R-I-N-G BOHHH-ring. There is not a single drop of management-slash-business-slash-corporate blood in my veins. (Sorry babe, 'kaw na lang magtrabaho, and I'll design the house.:D) I have to have regular transfusions pa, because my body rejects the donated liters each and every time. Bleh. I am normal! I am mediocre! Shriek!X0

Which brings me to my next exposition. I therefore have come to the enlightened idea that I will not condemn myself to a seriously tedious eight-hour job for the rest of my happy young life after all!:D Imagine, eight effing hours?? Not to mention travel time and horrible over time and all other extra time that will be wasted on a heartless money-gulping entity? Yech. Whenever shall I see the sun again? Newp, the pallid, disgustingly squishy-fat employee is not the ideal for me.

Rather, me go business!:D All on my very own!:D (with hunny garlicky bread of course.:D you get capital. me lounge about and squander capital.:D) John Gokongwei's speech to the graduates of err I forgot, 2004? was like a ray of hope in the dismal smog-filled atmosphere of my life. Get into the corporate world, learn everything you can, then get out!:D Happiness! Joy! And get into a business that I can really sink my teeth into; something happy, sunny, adventurey!:D Titles, distinction, and prestige are not important, Izzy dear. (Tell that to yourself maybe a hundred more times so it can sink in. Hopefully.) Now money, that we need, uh-hum. And no more daily eight-hour stupors!:D I can be master of my time and when the business is well on its way (yippee!) I can train and do all the stuff I want, yahoo!:D

And so that is the game plan. That is the master plan.:D

It is not worth all the effort to become the best in everything when nobody really cares anyway. (Lalo na kung 'di ka naman talaga the best in everything. Or kahit best in something. 'Di ba?) So I shall henceforth quit trying to prove myself to everyone and concentrate on being happy. Yippee! Happiness is a decision. (Parang love. Naks.) Therefore I decide to be happy in my mediocrity. Sink into oblivion! Revel the anonymity!

.................

...holy SHET. May paper pa pala sa Marketing, tangina. Bad trip. Inaantok na akoooooooo. It's so hard to stay awake after mga 11 to 12 now (gosh so aga!:P) because my happy body clock is now well on its way to become a morning person's body clock.:P Hee hee. Oh well. Don't expect me to have the stamina na for parties and inumans (lalo na 'pag aalis na si Cinderella). 'Nung Friday nga lang e, dyozzz miyo. Alas onse pa lang bumabagsak na mata ko. Wala pa akong ininom niyan ha, exag. (Dahil 'di na ako umiinom! Yippee! I am happy and sober and clean.:D No more incoherent ramblings and throwing up all over the lawn, no sirree.:D) But I wake up so early now! Too early to be legal for a normal teenager (holy shet, 'di na pala ako teenager. I am OLD. I shall be a full-blown adult in less than a year. I can get married without parental consent!X0 Tamang tama dahil magpapakasal na nga ako bago maggraduate, shet!X0) Oh well.

If we can't kiss under the midnight moon, we can huggle watching the sunrise.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Tagay tagay lang...

2005-12-11T22:10:00.000+08:00

Tidbits of my life now.

Marketing is stress.

School sucks. I don't wanna school no more. School boring.

I want a Kuya Bogs. And Kuya Boy.:D And Daddy Oliveros. Yippee!:D

FYI: I am going to get married a few months before graduation.XO According to my mum's psychic friend, that is.:D Har har har. Seconded pa by Kare and her psychic cards. Har har har. How wonderful.XD (well...in fairness...XP)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

:(

2005-11-13T23:01:00.000+08:00

Why does reading this create a big lump in my throat and make me want to cry? Am I utterly mushy now?:(

101 Most Romantic/Passionate/Sweet Things To Do For Your Girlfriend/Boyfriend
1. Watch the sunset together.
2. Take showers together.
3. Back rubs/massages.
4. Listen to classical music and cuddle in the dark or w/ blacklight.
5. French Kiss.
6. Hold her w/ hands inside the back of her shirt.
7. Whisper to each other.
8. Cook for each other.
9. Skinny dip.
10. Make out in the rain.
11. Dress each other.
12. Undress each other.
13. Kiss every part of their body.
14. Hold hands.
15. Sleep together. (Actually sleep with each other, not sex)
16. One word: Foreplay
17. Sit and talk in just underwear.
18. Buy gifts for each other.
19. Roses.
20. Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and wear it every time you're together.
21. Wear his clothes.
22. Find a nice secluded place to lie and watch the stars.
23. Incense/candles/oils/blacklights and music make for great cuddling/sex.
24. Kiss at every chance you get.
25. Don't wear underwear and let them find out.
26. Kinky is bad; Blindfolds are good.
27. Lightly kiss their collarbone and their jawbone just below the ear, then whisper I love you.
28. Bubble baths.
29. Go for a long walk down the beach at midnight.
30. Make love.
31. Write poetry for each other.
32. Kiss/smell her hair.
33. Hugs are the universal medicine.
34. Say I love you, only when you mean it and make sure they know you mean it.
35. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc.
36. Tell her that she's the only girl you ever want. Don't lie.
37. Spend every second possible together.
38. Tell her that she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to. And mean it.
39. Look into each other's eyes.
40. Very lightly push up her chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.
41. Talk to each other using only body language and your eyes.
42. When in public, only flirt w/ each other.
43. Walk behind her and put your hands in her front pockets.
44. Put love notes in their pockets when they aren't looking.
45. Clothes are no fun.
46. Buy her a ring.
47. Keep one of her bras somewhere where you see it everyday.
48. Sing to each other.
49. Read to each other.
50.... PDA = Public Display of Affection.
51. Take advantage of any time alone together.
52. Tell her about how you answered every question in math with her name
53. Draw. (If you can)
54. Let her sit on your lap.
55. Go hiking and camp out together in the woods or on a mountain.
56. Lips were made for kissing. So were eyes, and fingers, and cheeks, and collarbones, and hands, and ears.
57. Kiss her stomach.
58. Always hold her around her hips/sides.
59. Guys like half-shirts.
60. Take her to dinner and do the dinner for two deal.
61. Spaghetti (Ever see Lady and the Tramp?)
62. Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.
63. Unless you can feel their hear beating, you aren't close enough.
64. Dance together.
65. Sit in front of a roaring fire and make out/make love.
66. I love the way a girl looks right after she's fallen asleep with her head in my lap.
67. Carry her to bed.
68. Waterbeds are fun.
69. You figure it out.
70. Do cute things like write I love you in a note so that they have to look in a mirror to read it.
71. Break every one of your parent's relationship rules for them.
72. Make excuses to call them every 5 minutes 7
3. Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way to call and say I love you.
74. Call from your vacation spot to tell them you were thinking about them.
75. Remember your dreams and tell her about them.
76. Ride your bike 8 miles just to see them for a few hours.
77. Ride home and call them.
78. Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.
79. Somehow incorporate them into any kind of religion or worship you have.
80. Be Prince Charming to her parents. (Brownie Points)
81. Act out mutual fantasies together. (Not necessarily sexual)
82. Brush her hair out of her face for her.
83. Stay up all night to think of 101 ways to be sweet to them.
84. Hang out with his/her friends. (more brownie points)
85. Go to church/pray/worship together.
86. Take her to see a romantic movie and remember the parts she liked.
87. Cuddle together under a full moon on a clear night.
88. Learn from each other and don't make the same mistake twice.
89. Everyone deserves a second chance.
90. Describe the joy you feel just to be with him/her.
91. Make sacrifices for each other.
92. Really love each other, or don't stay together.
93. Write a fictional story about how you met/fell in love, etc. and give it to them.
94. Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren't thinking about them, and make sure they know it.
95. Love yourself before you love anyone else.
96. Buy her a charm bracelet/necklace w/her name on it.
97. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.
98. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.
99. Sleep naked together.
100. Stand up for them when someone talks trash.
101. Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, "Sweet dreams."

Huh, who am I kidding. I am the most romantic mush-head on earth. Of course my blatant "oh, look at me, I am logic and practicality personified!" chuvaness is my feeble defense mechanism in trying to deny that I am in fzct a severely sappy mush-head who cries at romantic movies and daydreams of the 101 things mentioned above and more, a defense mechanism that has the neat label of "projection". (err, at least I think it was. Psy101 seems so far away.:o Hey wait, no, dagnabbit, that wasn't it!:o what's that defense mechanism when you become the exact opposite of that trait of yours that you don't like?:P) But you already know that.:P

...and the sembreak came. and the sembreak went.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Is it too early for a Christmas wish list?

2005-11-13T21:53:00.000+08:00

I wish I were pretty.

I wish I weren't tall and awfully gangly and spindly.

I wish time would just speed mercifully by so this horrendous charade would be over.X0

I wish I could believe in myself.

I wish there was something I could believe in myself.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hello!:D

2005-11-02T18:56:00.000+08:00

Oh yeah, that's right, went to Palawan nga pala. Wheeeeeeeeeee fishies! Water! Snorkelling! Underground river! Bar-hopping (or a magnificent attempt to anyway)!

Well anyway. Now, on to more important, selfless efforts that strive for such things as the betterment of society and peace and goodwill to all men: Bigger Brighter Legs, here I come!XD Yippee!

Two weeks of vacation to go! Die school die!:D Curse you to the deepest bowels of the abyss!:D Yippee! All those in favor of slowly and deliberately dripping glutinous, richly onyx-colored, highly flammable kerosene all over the campus while belting out roaring gouts of maniacal laughter as a single flaming match slices a graceful, deadly arc of fiery death through the air to transform the vast edifices of terror into a great, blinding, scorching inferno of doom where the few brave teachers who valiantly but rather imprudently decide that a life without conviction and principles is no life at all (even if that life be somewhat short, thirty minutes tops) choose to consume the last moments of their lives heralding such ideals as education, discipline, and societal order (bah!) in completely anonymous glory, say AYE!

AYE!:D

...............and my sugar rush is over.:D Milo bars, yum.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

IT IS FINISHED.

2005-10-14T20:02:00.000+08:00

I have survived.

SMEG SEM IS OVER! WHOO-HOO!!XD

SMEG! SMEG! SMEG IS I!XD

Finally.

Surely, I have learned a great deal for the past five most horrible months of my life. Such pearls of wisdom, which I shall graciously share with the world shortly hereafter, are surely invaluable to life. (I was most validated when I quoted them to my imaginary pet turtle and he concurred with my opinion (bobbled his head a bit).) Here they are, then:

1. If you are a risk-averse, you are not risk-lover.
2. Guys, obvious naman 'yan 'di ba?
3. Anuva!

...And thus, my considerable mental repertoire leaves SMEG sem greatly enriched. Huzzah!

Now, on to more important things, most speedily! Like movies! Malls! Happiness! Let us now erase from our memories all the dark, unnameable things that have plagued us, deep in the bowels of the accursed Ching Tan! Away, foul cretins!

On to happiness! On! On! (Forget the fact that you barely scraped a 3!)

GOOD-BYE, SMEG SEM! I am now considerably more and less of a peson because of you.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Lah dee dah.

2005-09-05T23:35:00.000+08:00

After twenty-five thousand long years, whoooo.

To sum up this coming week:
Monday: Finance LT. Just finished. Already have siguro bawas 2-4 points. Fuckity.
Tuesday: Report sa archi. Haven't done it yet. Am absolutely brilliant.
Wednesday: Problem set sa Stat. FUCK.
Thursday: Finance case. Bleargh.
Friday: OR LT3. Lord, kill me now.:P

Happiness. Oh, happiness. Happiness is a choice.

AHEM.

YAHOO! I am happy.:D

But seriously, I truly believe that I have finally reached a (somewhat) higher plane of existence where people actually do not give a gecko's ass about their grades!:D Hurrah! I have transcended.:D Transcendental am I.:D

Hrrr. Still, I do wish matapos na ang sem.:D Which, incidentally, passed by like a flitty flying ghost.:o I did not feel SMEG sem at all.:o Seriousness.:o Well, maybe a weenie little bit, but it went like zshooooooooom and I barely felt it at all.:o Or maybe I'm becoming old. Rats.:P

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

It's me!:D

2005-08-14T17:12:00.000+08:00

Ako na rin.:D Highlight what applies to you daw. Okidoki then.:)

smoked a cigar(ette) > nope. still haven't been tempted 'nuff.
madeout with a member of the same sex
crashed a friend's car > i don't even drive. loser. sniff.
stolen a car > and then do what with it? i can't drive. loser. sniff.
been in love > hmm. it's actually "love" rather than "in love." But oh, if you must.:) I love you dear.:)
been dumped > sana hindi. :'(
shoplifted > heh heh heh sure.
been fired > fired from what?o_0
been in a fist fight
snuck out of my parent's house
had feelings for someone who didnt have them back > i've only had two really really real "crushes" in my life, and i believe at both times they were reciprocated.:o
been arrested
made out with a stranger
gone on a blind date
lied to a friend
had a crush on a teacher
been to Europe
skipped school > it's but normal, isn't it?o_0
slept with a co-worker > what co-worker?o_0
seen someone die
had a crush on one of your LJ friends
been to Canada
been to Mexico
been on a plane
thrown up in a bar > not in a bar.:D
purposely set a part of myself on fire > hair?:D it shrivels up in such a fascinating manner.
eaten Sushi
been snowboarding > show where?:o
met someone in person from LJ
been moshing at a concert > not a concert dude, me.:P
been in an abusive relationship
taken painkillers > goodbye, dysmenorrhea! i worship you, advil!:D
love someone or miss someone right now > drat. you've made me into a complete pile of mush.:P but i miss you.:D
laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
made a snow angel > again, snow?o_0
had a tea party
flown a kite
built a sand castle > or attempted to anyway.:D
gone puddle jumping
played dress up
jumped into a pile of leaves
gone sledding
cheated while playing a game (power overwhelming!!) > yes, power overwhelming.:D don't know how you can live without it.:D and show me the money.:D
been lonely
fallen asleep at work/school > hekhekhek. this is the norm.:D
used a fake id
watched the sunset > mmmm. one of the priceless joys in life.
felt an earthquake > it made my clay figure tumble down!XP
touched a snake > lovely.:D
slept beneath the stars > well, i almost fell asleep anway.
been tickled > grf.
been robbed > right under my nose, dagnabbit!:P
been misunderstood > sure.
petted a reindeer/goat > yike!
won a contest > way back in the high school days...
run a red light
been suspended from school
been in a car accident
had braces > still have 'em.
felt like an outcast > sure. almost all the time.
eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night (make that in one hour or less)
had deja vu > had deja vu. had deja vu. had deja vu.
danced in the moonlight
hated the way you look > most of the time.:P
witnessed a crime
pole danced > to an invisible pole. hekhekhek.
questioned your heart > of course. we must be certain.
been obsessed with post-it notes
squished barefoot through the mud > bleh.
been lost
been to the opposite side of the country > almost.
swam in the ocean
felt like dying > literally. like my soul was floating away from my body. and no, i wasn't drunk or high at the time.:P
cried yourself to sleep > sniffle.
played cops and robbers
recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
sung karaoke > "livin' la vida loca" in my utterly manly voice, sure.
paid for a meal with only coins > poorness!
done something you told yourself you wouldn't > i have the EQ of a glowworm.:D
made prank phone calls > in my childhood.:D
laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose > i don't think i have, but maybe i blocked the memory.:D
caught a snowflake on your tongue > snowwwww????
danced in the rain
written a letter to Santa Claus > and the Tooth Fairy.:D
been kissed under a mistletoe
watched the sun rise with someone you care about
blown bubbles
made a bonfire on the beach
crashed a party
gone rollerskating > skating?o_0 would that be a skateboard?o_0 rollerskates?o_0
had a wish come true
humped a monkey
worn pearls > all faux, man, all faux.
jumped off a bridge
screamed vagina in class > hmmm.:D
ate dog/cat food
told a complete stranger you loved them
kissed a mirror > hehehe vain.:D
sang in the shower
have a little black dress > i had one when i was a KID. now i don't have any. i suck.:P
had a dream that you married someone > yikes.
glued your hand to something > hehehehe mighty bond.:D
got your tongue stuck to a flag pole
kissed a fish
worn the opposite sexes clothes > you should see my high school pics.:D
been a cheerleader > yes, in complete contradiction with the previous statement.:P
sat on a roof top
screamed at the top of your lungs
done a one-handed cartwheel
talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
stayed up all night > this is the norm.:D
didnt take a shower for a week > almost, but no cigar.:D
pick and ate an apple right off the tree
climbed a tree > does two inches from the ground count?:D
had a tree house > but i wanted one though.:(
are scared to watch scary movies > but i absolutely love 'em.:D
believe in ghosts > waaaaaah mumu!X0
have more then 30 pairs of shoes > i wish.:P
worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
gone streaking
played ding-dong-ditch
played chicken
been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
been told you're hot by a complete stranger > again, i wish.:P
broken a bone
been easily amused > ako pa, ako ay mababaw.:D
caught a fish then ate it > yaaaaaaaak! wala man lang cooking in the middle??o_0
made porn
caught a butterfly
laughed so hard you cried > baliw.
cried so hard you laughed > baliw.
mooned/flashed someone
had someone moon/flash you
cheated on a test > hindi lt pramis.:D
have a Britney Spears CD

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Happiness is in a shopping bag.:D

2005-08-14T15:52:00.000+08:00

Finally. After enough years have passed for the dinosaurs to make a return of the comeback part II revived again, I am finally able to blog again.:D Oh happiness.XD

Ohmy. Had almost forgotten the sheer euphoric high that only shopping and throwing away heapfuls of moneyy in order to acquire material things that increase my material wealth as well as up my material happiness and thus reinforce the materialisticness of my materialistic nature can give.XD Wahoo!:D Bought an absolutely gorgeous blazer that is absolutely sexy with only a bra underneath.:D (and pants, of course, and undies, wtf are you thinking??:o naughty, naughty.) Abs, here I come!XD Wahoo! And a prettyful dress.:o Me, wearing a dress!:o Can you imagine?:o I was going to buy absolutely sexy lingerie, but alas, the blazer had me pinned mercilessly under its utterly suggestive no matter how non-sentient gaze.:D Teeheehee.

Hmmm. If I subsist on canned tuna every week, I can save enough money to buy new clothes every weekend!:D Love.

Harrumpf, but I want to go bookshopping in booktopia.:o Nagkaroon ng booksale sa may dela costa last week, and I positively drooled.X0 Drool drool drool.X0 But one book is about equal to a new pair of pants or a new top, give or take a few hunnerds.X0 Utter sadness.

I shall have to choose between being a fabulously well-read frump or being a fabulously made-up emptyhead.X0 Oh, what a quandary. Well, if I don't eat I suppose I can be a fabulously well-read and fantastically made-up anorexic.:D

Speaking of that, people've been saying I'm growing thin. Ohno. (is that right? Growing thin?:o Or is it supposed to be, like, shrinking thin?:o Oh what a puzzle.) Ohmy. That is not the goal. The goal is buffness. Yahoo!

No time, no time, no time at all.:o I am juggling too many things.:o Hmmm. Already I've discarded the less important things, like my social life.XP Well, things aren't crumbling around me just yet.:D Hoom hoom.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

:D

2005-07-27T15:08:00.000+08:00

All is well in the world.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hummmm.

2005-07-24T20:36:00.000+08:00

I really don't know what I want.:P There is something simmering underneath, but it is buried too deep.:P

AGAINST ALL ODDS

if I drown myself

in words
in sensations
in nameless, unempirical things

will I not revel in death,

free from the knowledge that i am but
a statistic?

My attempt to protest against Stat.:D Hihihi.

-------
you don't even have to know me just take me away
up and beyond the clear blue skies is where i want to be

(please. just please do take me away.XP)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Waaaaaa.

2005-07-20T23:50:00.000+08:00

Lately I've been running on autopilot.o_0 (i typed autopolit. ohmyGOD. I am dysgraphic I swear.X0) Which is a very bad thing huhuhu. All that glorious wit, creativity, spontaneity, zshooom! down the drain, goodbye.XP Waaaaah. I swear to god sobrang nakarelate ako kay Kadu sa Turumba huhuhu. Humpf! We are being swept away by capitalism! Death no longer flies on black wings, it races on tiny little ratty feet. (rat race, get it?:D good god, there are the dredges of my wit for you. Bleh.) No more time for self and for nature. Huhuhu. Why can't I have my own pace?:( Don't have time for meself anymore.:( It's not that I can't do it, because I can, truly I can. It's just that I have to turn myself off to do it and to stick to doing it huhuhu. My organizer is full of orange and green marker highlights (orange: class, green: training) and little chicken scratches that barely pass for handwriting signalling yet another deadline due, yet another test, blah dee blah. Huhuhu. Utter sadness.

On a happier note, watched Fantastic Four last Sunday errr late night at gb3. Happier, I say, because even though the movie was so-so Johnny Storm was OHMILORD HOOOOOOOOT.:o Wahoo, sulit na sulit ang movie, yehey!:D Lalo na I didn't pay for it wahoo!:D Grabedad shet.XD Gwapo gwapo gwapoooooooo. Adorable!:D Hotness!:D *drooooooooool* perfect abs, perfect back, ohmilord can I just say.XD and what adorable cheekiness, wheeeee!:D Happiness!XD At least nakalalabas pa rin ako kahit minsan sa weekend kahit papaano nang matino, kahit si mum at si inggy kasama ko (ohwell at least libre lahat at pwedeng gumastos wahoo!:D) 'Pag ako nabuwisit lalabas at lalabas ako mag-isa, leche. (simot nga lang pera ko huhuhuhu.) Waaaaah my life is an utter bore. Bleh.

Haynako. Off to go compile my group's crummy finance paper bleh. Cruddy ruddy crud.XP My life is an utter bore.:P

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Halloa!:D

2005-06-28T22:56:00.000+08:00

Bite-sized attempts at philosophizing while whiling (yes, it's not my very best english:P) away my time (and boredom) while jogging:

The world is no place for those who wish to remove themselves from it.:D (no duh. 'di ko na maalala ang lightning-fast thought processes ko na nag-culminate sa nuknukan ng kalalimang kabanaagang ito.o_0)

---

May tanong ako. Gusto ko lang biglang malaman. 'Di ba tayo nagsimula sa isang cell, tas nag-mitosis et cetera hanggang maging blastula eklat et cetera hanggang lumaki na tayo into a humongous unicellular organism? E 'di ba made up of atoms din tayo?:o E 'di ba atoms are uhhh anong tawag dun, um, indivisible?:o Paano 'yun? Nais kong mapagtanto ang kasagutan sa itong palaisipang nakapapagpabagabag sa aking mumunting utak.

---

Hm. Perhaps there are no limitations. But if there aren't, then the horizons are too limitless, too expansive, and the far ends of the sky, rather than being unseeable, are all too evident in their depthlessness. Then the need for limitations thus arises; for only by setting limitations and surpassing each one in turn can we measure how far into the gaping, frightful endlessness with its infinite possibilities we have gone. (naisip ko ito noong iniisip ko kung may limit ba tuhod ko. Hm. Mukhang according to me, wala!:D Hohoho.)

---

I am absolutely BORED with my current life.:P The days are so short and I don't do anything at all significant for the betterment of my life. Curse this wretched school, hohoho. (ohyes, you've all heard this rant before. You may safely skip to the next paragraph to spare yourself a good degree of infernal whining.) Sana kung mga isa o dalawang subject na lang kailangan kong kunin, hurrah.:D So I can waste my time doing absolutely useless things like read all I want (used to read at lightning speed), draw all I want (used to draw pretty good...actually I still draw pretty good, haha vain), write all I want (oh damn. I don't write as good as I could potentially be anymore. Bleh.) and go to lots of different places and have lots of adventure.:D Alas. My reading is limited to, ugh, my utterly horrid Finance book and my abysmally wretched Stat book. (who am I kidding? haven't even so much as cracked it open yet!XP)

But let us move on.:D Time management, why, that is key.:D The problem is, things are falling too neatly into a nice little routine. Blah blah blah. Where is the excitement? The spontaneity? The thrill of the unknown?XP (pero as of today I have one hundred and twenty bucks to last me 'til the end of the week, at yung twenty mawawala pa dahil pambayad ko dito sa internet, so wala rin, hahaha.) Oh well. Something exciting is bound to happen. Ahem. Significant cough to the Great Doler of Fun and Dancing to People's Lives, whoever he/she/it may be, hem hem.

Hoo hay. I am off to have a nice little shower and finish my novel. I ADORE Sherlock Holmes. Can I just say. Madly infatuated with him is what I am.XD Nighty.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

F is for Finance. F is for Fuck.

2005-06-19T15:16:00.000+08:00

I cannot take much more of this!X0 Majority of this weekend has been sadly dedicated to trudging through my abominable finance book, and it has left me feeling weak and helpless.X0 I swear to god I am as DRAINED as a drained thingy.X0 Like an exsanguinated hapless vampire victim.X0 Sadness. And I still have one more effing chapter to go!X0 Fuck Finance.X0 Bleh.

I want to strangle our finance teacher in ways no man (or woman (or witch)) has ever been strangulated before since the dawn of time and witch-burning.XP Goddaym that woman has serious bore issues. I swear the military and the more ironhanded (and underhanded) of our police may have more use for her in, say, innovative new torture tactics.XP Say, put her in an isolated padded cell with the worst of criminals and spies and let her drone on by herself (ensuring of course that the criminal/spy is safely disabled from any and all means of strangling her himself and thus liberating himself from the impending doom) and voila! Foolproof! No more crime, and the Philippines will actually have a fighting chance against the massive international secret networks.XD

Architecture is love.:D Architecture is fun.:D I am SO glad I didn't force myself to take some unutterably boring ME-related free elec that could've been counted for a minor degree. No, sirree. None of that no more for me.XP Architecture is probably the only class I will love this sem. And philo prolly. And history too. Ohlookatthat, all of them aren't MAJOR subjects. Harrumph. In the meantime, I want to chuck all my major subjects out the window.XP Bleh. Oh well. Sayang ang dalawang taong ginugol sa ME. Sayang ang perang DAPAT LANG na magugugol ko pag graduate ko with an ME degree. Harrumpf.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hum.

2005-06-18T13:28:00.000+08:00

Hay. First week of school done and already I've sprouted not one, not two, but three stress pimples.:o With another one on the way. Hyuk, parang anak.XD

Mygulay. I must now have insane amounts of discipline which I had hitherto not known to exist within the bowels of my unconscious self. And almost an psychotic adherence to my schedule, ergo time management.X0 SMEG sem and training for the national team do not mix.X0 Goodbye, all other extra-curricular activities. Goodbye, social life.:D Hihihi.

Well. Truth be told, I fear that yet again I find myself totally out of my depth. Waaaaah. I don't want this to be Korea all over again.XP I'm not ready to be a national (gulp) representative of my martial art.:o That entails a certain (very high:D) degree of mastery and a lot of years to really let it seep into me heart, mind, and soul. Sa Korea nga I was like huhuhu, wtf am I doing here.:( Hum. Oh well. Yuh, the Seagames is a once-in-a-errr-very-long-time opportunity, so yes, I will do my best. And yes, SMEG sem is also a once-in-my-lifetime opportunity, so I suppose I'll also do my best in THAT. Huhuhu. Stress shall settle down upon me like thick layers of dust accumulated over the centuries in the deepest recesses of...wherever.:o

Speaking of that. Hum. Must make my schedule. Yes yes. Must adhere to it too. Yes yes. Will train later too. Yes yes. Might as well study too. Yes yes.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Bouncy again.:D

2005-06-12T20:55:00.000+08:00

Hmmm. Will be taking a bath in a few.:D Yes I will make myself pasma and make all my hand veins stand out.:( But we will be going out and watching a movie tonight (last time I checked we still were anyway.:P) and what is that movie?? Mr and Mrs Smith, yeah! Time to drool over Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie again, whooo!:D Yes I watched it na. So what.:D Bonding again with mum and inggy. Been a while, uh-huh.

Bought uberloads of stuff pala kahapon for the condo, yay.:D Condo will look like proper home now.:D A little telly here, a little PS2 there...and badabing, badaboom!:D Oooh and bought new undies din. I sewed cute little buttons on them kanina so I'll know which ones are mine.:D Love buttons. Love undies.:D Hmmmm shall have to buy uberlots more.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Oh the mortification. Oh the shame.

2005-06-12T19:43:00.000+08:00

Thunder and lightning! Gadzooks! Egad! Stars and stripes!(o_0)

I am mortified, ashamed. Oh, lordy. I have made a bloody public spectacle of myself.o_0 I am a sissy wuss. I suck.X0

Can you lot believe I actually got rip-roaring drunk over red bloody wine?? Oh, the mortification.X0 As in the barf-your-insides-out end of the rip-roaring-drunk spectrum.XP

I really really really really didn't expect to get drunk on red wine.X0 Heckle, I drink at least two bottles at Christmastime without even breaking a sweat!X0 But I haven't been drinking for a very long time now (see, I said I'd quit.XP) and alas, I fell under the mighty blows of
piddling red "social drinking" wine. I never saw THAT coming.o_0 Honest I didn't.

But that's not the point.X0 Aaaaagh. I made a bloody awful spectacle of myself at a gathering where I had the perfectly pure intention of being nice and quiet and background-y since really, I was a bit of an extra on the scene. Oh but look, I suddenly decide to shove my drunken ass center stage instead. Oh, the mortification.X0

I'm sorry dearest. Really I am.:(

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Cough. Hack. Wheeze. Choke.

2005-05-31T21:25:00.000+08:00

Strangely, being sick all by your lonesome self with absolutely no one (no one! at all!T_T) to cuddle and baby and take care of you (sniffle) isn't such a totally ratty buggeriffic experience after all.:D Why, it thoroughly tests your mettle is what it does.:D Now that I know that I can nurse myself through raging fever and horrible flu, why, I can do anything by myself, hurrah!:D Imagine plodding to the ref to get your medicines, drinking 'em down blah dee blah every six hours, changing your three layers of long-sleeved fluffy tops and jackets and taekwondo gis every now and then because you soak them full of sweat the first two minutes, changing the sheets for the same reason, magicking up food when cooking is a vague foreign concept and there is no food AT ALL except raisin in the fridge, and sweating through twenty-four hours of darkness and incessant coughing worthy of Raistlin Majere all by your lonesome self, when you have fever as hot as a blue-white star (that's the hottest right?:o) and your bones and joints are as freezing as um. whatever's the coldest.o_0 absolute zero, yeah.o_0 and you have the headache to beat all headaches and when you lift your head an inch from your sweat-soaked pillow it decides to take off by itself (the head, not the pillow) and go for a spin.X0

...so anyway my point is I HAVE SURVIVED.:D Wahoo! But now I'm still sick. Hehehe I suck.XD Mum says I look like Tisika(?), whatever that is. Sabi niya basta raw may TB.:o Oh great I have tuberculosis.X0

...........

My hands are shivering all over the place. I don't know why.o_0 I haven't had one drop of coffee.:o Good lordy.:o

...........

Hmm. Still mulling over what to get for my free elec.:o

...........

Dude what's up with my fucking hands??o_0 I usually have the hands of a neurosurgeon.:o

............

What do I get for my free elec please please please??? Free elecs suck.XP I don't know what to get, waaaaaaaah. I am an indecisive spineless little mole. Yes, mole. That little black round thing on your face. What, it doesn't have a spine, does it??XP

............

Cough. Hack. Wheeze. Choke.X0 That's basically my present life in four words.:D I can even whittle it down to one: coughhackwheezechoke.:D Oh I am witty.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Gyaaalgrghhh.

2005-05-24T12:35:00.000+08:00

Ooogh. Aaagh. Bleargh. Bluiebleeblooooo.

(That's what happens to people who are drowning in stress. Yours truly for example. Holy fuck what I wouldn't effing do get this bloody fucking semester over and effing done with, goddaym. yes, I am swearing again. Fuck.)

...oh p.s. I should drop school and get a job instead. I think I'd do great quarrying. Why? Because the fucking bags under my eyes are large enough to carry fucking boulders, that's why. Oh jeebus my wit has deteriorated into a congealed pool of slush.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hahaha Imma Bitch.XP That's HIB for short.

2005-05-19T23:27:00.000+08:00

Ohoho what fun. I accidentally pulled the plug here in the cafe, and my computer as well as the two flanking mine conked into nothingness.:D Buti yung isa si Ingga, no problems there, aren't you a sweet forgiving dear?:D Pero the guy to my left was throwing a silent tantrum when he was turning his PC back on, haha. As in pounding on the keypads and everything.:P Well, sorry siya, I am NOT in a very sorry mood today. Quite the contrary, I am in a very hissy pissy bitchy mood today.:D Die, bitch.:P Gusto mo ng away??? Bring it on!XP I shall pull your steaming intestines from your writhing body and coil them round your head and choke you to even higher stages of death. Beeeeets.:P

Fuck man, what an annoying little boy. Stop fiddling with your stupid webcam and your monitor. Shit, are you on drugs or something?? Airhead.:P

Am supposed to be studying for Eco. Okay fine I will. But I am in a very pissy mood. I believe I shall need lots of comfort stuff. Like food and coffee and such material things. Yes I am a very materialistic girl. So what.:P

-----

Bye bye Marco.:'( I didn't even get to see you, much less hug you good-bye.:(

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Fully Booked, the place of my doom.:D

2005-05-14T23:49:00.000+08:00

Oh I forgot to post one bit of nice news.:D Went to Powerplant nga 'di ba with the real-world accounting group...haha we looked like a unicellular organism of yuppies, yuck...XD ANYWAY I went to Fully Booked and apart from the drooling over the books part (which is a given, anyway) I bought two nice new sketchpads.:D Or you could think of them as two nice new large blank notebooks, wheeee.:D I ADORE bound crisp blank sheets of paper.:D They are my fetish.:D I adore them utterly.:D I collect them and sometimes in the middle of the night I furtively take them out and admire them one by one and run my hands down the nice parchment and sigh in complete contentment.:D

Oh I want new clothes.:(

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Even more blogthings.

2005-05-14T23:25:00.000+08:00

Your Rising Sign is Leo

You are confident, self-assured, and more than a little vain.

And you have a flair for the dramatic - whether you're on stage or causing trouble.

Your spirit can't stay in one place very long.

You like to live in new places and travel the world.

Cultured and sophisticated, you pride yourself on having good taste.

You are an expert in art, music, food, and film.

What is Your Rising Sign?

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

More blogthings.

2005-05-14T23:05:00.000+08:00

Your Deadly Sins

Wrath: 80%

Gluttony: 60%

Pride: 60%

Sloth: 60%

Envy: 40%

Greed: 40%

Lust: 20%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 51%

You will die in prison, in a puddle of your own blood.

How Sinful Are You?

You are

What Rejected Crayon Are You?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when everything is uncertain, one moment heaven... the next moment hell.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

...cool! How totally accurate!:o except that part where I'll apparently do anything for love.o_0 No I won't.:P And to think the questions were all about animals.o_0 Weird. I have a runny nose.:(

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Blah.

2005-05-14T22:34:00.000+08:00

Haughty Intellectual

You are 71% Rational, 42% Extroverted, 42% Brutal, and 57% Arrogant.

You are the Haughty Intellectual. You are a very rational person, emphasizing logic over emotion, and you are also rather arrogant and self-aggrandizing. You probably think of yourself as an intellectual, and you would like everyone to know it. Not only that, but you also tend to look down on others, thinking yourself better than them. You could possibly have an unhealthy obsession with yourself as well, thus causing everyone to hate you for being such an elitist twat. On top of all that, you are also introverted and gentle. This means that you are just a quiet thinker who wants fame and recognition, in all likelihood. Rather lacking in emotion, introspective, gentle, and arrogant, you are most certainly a Haughty Intellectual! And, most likely, you will never achieve the recognition or fame you so desire! Sweet!

To put it less negatively:
1. You are more RATIONAL than intuitive.
2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted.
3. You are more GENTLE than brutal.
4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.

Compatibility:
Your exact opposite is the Schoolyard Bully. (Bullies like to beat up nerds, after all.)

Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Braggart, the Hand-Raiser, and the Robot.
*
*
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 65% on Rationality
You scored higher than 39% on Extroversion
You scored higher than 46% on Brutality
You scored higher than 65% on Arrogance

...oh great. I won't be getting my fame.:P

Coleocanth

Nightmare scales: Panic: 56%. Dread: 43%. Lampreys: 50%.

You are the COLEOCANTH. Everybody remembers that there's some reason or another you're important, but nobody can recall what it is-- and so they figure it must not have been THAT critical.
SEEK: paleontologists and people who are really good at Trivial Pursuit. AVOID: Indonesian fishermen.

...and I'm, like, whut?o_0

...I'm bored. And hungry. And selfish.:P

Izzy's version of Inggy's DLIL.

2005-05-14T22:06:00.000+08:00

Izzy's Daily Lessons in Life
1. Never dress up for anyone other than yourself. If you do, there's always that chance that someone won't be in the same planet as you on that given day anyway. Poor you then. Crud.
2. It's always stupid to depend on anyone. Why does one always forget this? One can have fun all by oneself. Crud.
3. It is imperative to one's sanity that one has a vehicle of her own on the off chance that she would like to go catch a movie by herself and maybe have a nice ice blended late at night. Preferably a nice snazzy one so she can go in style.
4. Commuting in stylish clothes is suicide.
5. Suicide can be hazardous to one's health.
6. Starbucks is open until 2 am.
7. Starbucks has Caramel Coffee Jelly. Which is a nice enough alternative when one is craving for Morrocan Mint.
8. There is always tomorrow for the movie and a later for the Starbucks. Hey, or one could try out the Mint Tazo instead. Can't be that bad.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Weekend.

2005-05-14T18:23:00.000+08:00

Yay, it's the weekend:D Nice, eventful week. Took Probability long test. Died. Rose from the dead just in time for real-world accounting presentation. Dayrit is cool.

Now I have uber tons of stuff to do for the weekend. Kanina holed myself up in the library to research for my eco paper (and soak up as much artificially cooled air I could). Waaaaaaah I miss airconditioning.X0 Now I don't want to do anything school-y. Am planning to go malling. As in NOW. I am in dire need of self-pampering. Anyone wanna come along?:P

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

More blogthings. Just because I'm bored.:D

2005-05-08T20:39:00.000+08:00

You Are 45% Normal

(Somewhat Normal)

While some of your behavior is quite normal...

Other things you do are downright strange

You've got a little of your freak going on

But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

How Normal Are You?

Your Seduction Style: The Coquette

You are a pro at playing the age old game of hard to get.
Your flirting style runs hot and cold, giving just enough to keep them chasing you.
Independent and self-sufficient, you don't need any one person to make you compelte.
And that independence is exactly what makes people pursue you.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

...but of course.:D Tell me something I don't know.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Beware the Gremlin.

2005-05-08T19:42:00.000+08:00

It speaks volumes of my colorful, jam-packed social life that I blog entry after entry here at five-minute intervals.XP Oh what a wonderful nightlife I have.XP I would've gone out and watched a movie, really I would, only I've been attacked by a sudden bout of thriftiness that even the mere thought of spending sends bucketfuls of icy guilt down my spine.XP Bleah. So I opt for the cheaper, 20 bucks-and-hour alternative here in the quiet little internet cafe. Oooooooh I am restless.

The Fully Booked branch in Gateway is OPEN now. Insert Ominous Sound. Ooooooooooh LORD I don't need to be psychic to know I'll be declaring bankruptcy sometime before the summer ends.X0 Haven't even bought any new clothes yet (for the past fifty years), waaaaaaaah. And to think I swore to myself (for the nth raised to infinity time) that, come the new schoolyear, I'll be Dignity, Elegance, Feminity, and Tranquility personified. That's DEFT. (Remove Elegance and add Austerity and that's DAFT for you.XP) I'll be floating around campus all immaculate and beatific, a far cry from the horrid, disheveled and utterly inelegant gremlin who presently has the gall to go walking around school under my name.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Dream.

2005-05-08T19:29:00.000+08:00

Which Member of the Endless Are You?

Tsk. I did SO wanted to be Death. Or Delirium. Dream can get borrrrrrrring some times.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Launchcast is my friend.:D

2005-05-08T18:47:00.000+08:00

Weepy, weepy over Love Songs on the Launchcast.:( Good grief I am a walking water bucket.XP This entire day I have done nothing but sleep, stare off into space (or into my Prob book, both amount to the same thing anyway) and generally feel all around weepy.X0 I should NEVER be left alone, good grievance.XP This can only mean one thing. Hormones, hormones, hormones. (oh how convenient it is to be a woman and chalk everything up to omnipresent omnipotent hormones.:D) Hihihi. Nevertheless, the time of the month is nearly upon my doorstep...o_0 Yiii. Oh that reminds me, have to return those vcds we borrowed last Friday. STILL haven't watched Doll Master, and that is because I am a frickin' lousy coward all alone in my yellow-lighted condo.o_0 Yiiiiiiiiiiiii.

Ohmilord just read about a UP prof who proved Andrew Wiles' proof of Fermat's Last Theorem false...:o Hohoho, what perfect timing, since kakasalamuha lang namin kay Andrew Wiles (under the stage name Daniel Keane) and all his wonderful adventures in the exciting fantasy world of his dusty little attic with such strange fantastic creatures such as long-dead self-centered mathematicians, who labor for many years to fulfill their quests of proving obscure theorems and who all break into song at the slightest provocation.:D Mind, I liked that kooky little musical. (A musical about math, isn't it wonderful?XD) Pierre de Fermat was the kookiest by far.:D

Anyhow, what Edgar Escultura, UP Prof in question, was actually refuting was not Andrew Wiles' proof per se, but hwow, something totally basic and foundational, the real number system...o_0 Can you lot believe that two of its axioms are actually false?o_0 Fantastic, like wow. (The trichotomy axiom and completeness axiom, he says. And I go, say whut? not because I am completely flabbergasted and appalled that the whole seemingly solid foundation upon which my feet have been planted for the past many long years has given a violent shudder, but because hihihi, I don't even know what the trichotomy and completeness axioms are. Hihihi. I'm so smart.XD)

Anyway. 'Nuff of that.:D Back to happy things.:D Ooooooh nice love songs.:D Such a sap I am when in hormonal overdrive.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

The artist within is hopefully not into its death throes yet.

2005-05-03T23:12:00.000+08:00

Oooooooh bay-deeh-wehy. Inggy and I are attempting to fulfill the frustrated artists within by snazzing up the condo, hurrah.:D We're doing errrrrr minimalist aren't we?o_0 and light wood?o_0 with old rose and the obscure shade of green accents!:D With of course my prettyful geometric deviance wall.:D Oh we could put tatami mats and stuff all over the place!:D and those nice muted yellow squarish lantern thingies pleeees?:D

Ugh, square.o_0 That reminds me, I must attempt to answer our problem solving homework.XP However, the keyword is MUST.:D That doesn't necessarily mean I will, donnit?:D Ho dee ho.:D

Now I am off to look for something interesting.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

An incoherent yet happy post.:D

2005-05-03T22:35:00.000+08:00

Grrrrrrrraaaaaaaarrr must find the entire season...err...what number is it now? 3? 4?o_0...of Smallville, wahoo.:D I must have at least a semblance of TV life, otherwise I shall be a loser forever.:D Ho dee ho.:D Lana is utteriffically THE most gee-yor-gee-yus hayup on the (daily) planet.:D Ohohoho what pun.XD (Yes I must stop.X0 But I cannot help it!:D)

Eco midterms this Friday, oh what joy. Thank you for this splendiforous blessing, oh we banal tritelings cannot thank you enough. Bleah.XP Gahhhhhhh 40-fugling-percent of the grade, whoo-hah. Study, study, study. That is the key.:D That is the key to pull up my abysmal 151 LT and my potentially mediocre grade in problem solving.XP

Goodbye, cum laude dreams.:D Oh what fun.:D We must all stop being GC, for that is solely for the GC Monster, that abhorrent and horrifying creature with deathly crabby pincers, a prominent vulture beak (complete with froth that bubbles on command and everything), a balding vulture head, spasmodic and all-seeing eyes, red plaid shirt, dumb shorts, and knee high socks.:D Hey, what horror! Oh, what an abomination!:D Oh terror strikes my heart to the core at the sight of such ner--ehm, monstrosities.:D

Anyway. On to more interesting stuff.:D Like um. Like er. Something something something.o_0 Ho dee ho dee ho. Something interesting pleeeeeeeeeees.XP Like right now pleeeeeeeeeees.XP

Happy happy joy joy.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Must be happy. Note to self.

2005-05-03T00:52:00.000+08:00

A chanced perusal of my blog spake volumes unto me about my wonderful life.XP Apparently I'm not a very happy person, am I?XP This from a dude who tries to be neurotically happy all the time. (well that spoke volumes as well, dinnit.XP) Ohlord goodGOD I am a hopeless depression junkie, blaaaaah.X0 No I am not no I am not no I am not.

I now promise that I shall blog about nice and happy things.:D Like the nice blue sky. Which is um, gloomy and dark right now 'cause it's night.o_0 gloom gloom gloom.

Nooooooooooooo. Happy dappy doo.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Me and the business world apparently don't jive.XP

2005-05-03T00:27:00.000+08:00

Your Birthdate: September 11

Your birth on the 11th day of the month makes you something of a dreamer and an idealist.

You work well with people because you know how to use persuasion rather than force.

There is a strong spiritual side to your nature, and you may have intuitive qualities inherent in your make up, too.

You are very aware and sensitive, though often temperamental.

Although you have a good mind and you are very analytical, you may not be comfortable in the business world.

You are definitely creative and this influence tends to make you more of a dreamer than a doer.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Unfortunately there is more than a grain of truth here.XP Fine, a whole friggin' coastline of it.XP I'm not really cut out for the business world, no I'm not, huhuhu. Yes I'm smart (and not just bookish smart but intuitively analytically abstractly smart as well, oooooooh I love myselfXD) but ooooooh I so HATE the rat race and I so HATE the fast life and I so HATE petty competition waaaaaaah I want to die.XP I just want to live in a nice cool peaceful mountain in an uber lovely house with beautiful minimalist lines and soft glowing muted colors and oooooooh lots of split levels because I just LOVE split-levels oooooooh I love them to death, ooooooh happiness.XD ...and then I'll make graphic novels all day. Waaaaaaah. I hate business. I hate the corporate world. I hate my course. Huhuhuhuhu. Whatever the hell I am doing here, I don't know.X0 (Well actually I do. It's a simple matter of me being pragmatic enough to realize that I cannot live prettily inside my head on my dreams alone and that I have to go back to the real world every now and then. Which entails munny, munny, and lotsa munny.XP Huhuhuhu my escapist tendencies cannot be given free reign, waaaaaaah.X0)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Hohoho useless post.:D

2005-05-02T23:40:00.000+08:00

I...am...craving for C2 right now, hurrah.:D Oooooooh I have not any research paper proposals for my wonderful (note my gritted teeth) Macroeconomics teacher.XP Bleah.XP Somehow I've managed to adjust a bit more to my workload the past week, or maybe it was simply because my sinat bouts allowed me to take the afternoons off, whoopdeedoo!:D Hurray for weak constitutions!:D

Blah dee blah dee blah. So many things to say, yet they all slip away happily once I (finally) park my ass in front of a reasonably working computer with a reasonably working DSL connection.:D Happy dappy doo.:D

I know I have nice serious stuff to blog about, like the stuff we discussed oh-so-nicely in Dappy's house when we (finally again) got together...well, I got together with them, since I wasn't there the last time, teeheehee...anyway, nice serious stuff, about parents and stuff. Almost made me feel like I should have another go at repairing the parent-child relationship.:D Harharhar. Sure.:D

Oooooooh C2. I definitely want a C2.XD

And mummy is very naughty. Yes she is. Yes she is. Snooping into other people's folders, tsk tsk tsk. Bad. Especially when those folders contain nicely incriminating pictures of yours truly, oh no, very bad, very bad indeed. Tsk tsk tsk.:P

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

My Summer Life.

2005-04-20T19:29:00.000+08:00

Suddenly my summer is a whirlwind of activity, whoooo.:D AS IN.X0 classes from 7.30-12, which wouldn't be such a bad thing really if they weren't specifically Economics with a slavedriver teacher who believes our worlds revolve around his precious macroeconomics, Probability with a teacher who teaches stuff I can answer while juggling three balls in one hand (yesss I can't do that.XP But for now I can for exaggeration's sake.XP) which only means that when the departmental long tests come stomping around the corner I shall DIE, and of course, the cherry on top of the very big....umm... Starbucks Caramel Coffee Jelly, whoooooooo!...is the Seminar on Problem Solving Techniques under Queena Lee-Chua and Fr. Ben.XP Good grievance. If there ever was a class designed to make you feel like you had the IQ of a really backward specimen of tapeworm, boy oh boy, this was it.XP Huhuhu. AT LEAST! I know the Petal of the Rose!:D Ooooh that reminds me. I shall go get myself knighted by the Fellowship of the Rose.:D I'm not so incredibly stupid after all.:D

ANYWAY. To continue whining and griping over my summer sched, I have summer training MWF 1-5, ANI TTH 1.30-2.40, and ADSA volunteer work sprinkled in there somewhere.X0 Not that I'm really whining or griping, mind. I wouldn't drop any of my stuffs if I can help it.XP Besides, having loads of activity is MANNA FROM HEAVEN compared to the three weeks of absolute NOTHINGNESS back at home.X0 Gahhhhh. At least I feel purposeful, which is something I don't really feel very often, gahhh.XP

And of course, the highlight of my day, the quasi-chance to see RJ!:D Which is not very often and for only a limited time, huhuhu, because he turns into a pumpkin at the stroke of 6pm.X0 I could probably compute the probability (or even the probability of me computing the probability, hardeeharhar) but then I'm not very masipag, am I, and that makes me wonder what the holy hells am I doing in Math195G.1, because I unfortunately cannot muster the stamina to undergo thirteen straight effing hours of torture to get that singular high of solving a really disgusting problem whose answer nobody really cares about anyway and which you really won't be applying to your everyday life anytime soon. Good grief, I swear she should get a life.o_0 or a nice hobby, like counting clouds or something.XP Good grievance.X0

Yaaaaah, I must be off. Still have tons to do.XP Can you lot believe I am actually studying?? What in the holy blazes???XP Holy fuck, there isn't even a longtest anywhere in the immediate periphery and I am STUDYING. Oh wonderfulness.XP Aaaagh. Well, turrah.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Sigh.

2005-04-12T00:39:00.000+08:00

Not feeling up to a long blog.

Went to Batangas and Tagaytay with the team. Had a glorious three days, nevermind I didn't go out when there was sun and went out when there wasn't. Ohohoho.

Got my grades. Showed mum. Six A's (including PE, ohohoho.) and a C+ (oh guess what it is? Accounting!XP). Mum takes one look and says, "o, bat C+ ka lang?? Accounting pa!" Oh joy.

Wanna go to condo na. Never want to return here again.X0

Hmmm. Methinks parents know something. Actually, I don't even think. Mum outright said it. Hmmm. Wonder how much they know. Fuckfuckfuck. Glorious.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Ego! Wherefore art thou??

2005-04-04T12:15:00.000+08:00

Oh FUCK. Now I'm all teary-eyed. Obviously, I have repressed my feelings about the whole affair. Godfuckingdammit.XP Obviously, I also feel strongly about the whole affair. Gahhhd. EGO! DUUUUUUUUUDE! Do your stuff mehn, I'm feeling the anxiety already!XP Defense mechanisms, do your stuff!X0

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Crud.

2005-04-04T11:46:00.000+08:00

Ohohoho. Boy, do I have an anecdote.

Yesternight Inggy and I were not-so-surreptitiously talking about getting our ears pierced for the second time. Needless to say, mommy went all ANO HINDI PWEDE ANG PANGET NG ITSURA NUN HINDI PWEDE so I went like, shrug, two years to go (cuz I'm 19. do the math.) and she said AY KAHIT NA HINDI TALAGA PWEDE KAHIT KELAN!! and her eyes went like bulging and everything. And I'm looking at her weirdly with my ohhhkay-like-you-have-a-say look.o_0

But no, that's only my intro.

Suddenly daddy ker-plops with a little explosion and rants on about ohhh, since dati pa nasteel na niya sarili niya to accept anything blah dee blah, na ngayon wala na siyang pakialam, kahit ano daw mangyari matatanggap niya, wala na siyang pake blah dee blah, and all sorts of shit that came spouting out very vehemently that you'd have to be really thick not to realize he has issues man ooooh that egocentric little sod I swear he can't be made to see reason because he is so wrapped up in his own world which he thinks revolves around himself (which it doesn't) and oh, he went on and on and on and went on about ohh, mas maganda na raw na mas maaga na kami maghiwalay the better blah dee blah, and then mummy goes 'di ba napakasama niyang sabihin sa anak? and daddy goes hinde mabuti nang ngayon pa lang sinasabi na! and then I mutter to Inggy, buti nga 'di tayo druggies e, which only meant hello, I'm a FUCKING GOOD GIRL, and then daddy goes SIGE, magdrugs kayo or whatever, are you daring me, wala akong pakialam! in this very intense way, and I was like whoa, chill out, I wasn't even talking to you, you sod.

Take note, he went all hey-ho because we talked about getting our ears pierced. Talk about issues, man. I dearly would've loved helping him sort himself out, but unfortunately he's way too far gone. Too egocentric and thinks he's bloody fucking right all of the time. What a loser.

Okay, I am not narrating this very well since obviously I'm still harboring pretty strong feelings about the whole affair. But no. I do not care.XP I do not care one whit anymore about the whole affair, hrumpf.

Anyway, suffice it to say that apparently my parents think we're hopeless cases and that we're too far gone to salvage even a wee bit of decency.XP Now they're making parinig na oh, they have three more to go to make it right (the three little pigs. erm, siblings.) SHURE, whatever. FUCK man, say whatever you want.XP

Jeebus, I didn't turn out that badly, did I? Did pretty decently, I should think...FUCKING HOUSE. And now I can't get out because I do not have a single peso to my name. Okay, that was exaggerating, I have about six bucks.o_0 Ohhhh crud I need comfort food.

For the record, what daddy said and everything else implied smarted. A little. Somewhere down there in the soft flesh of nerves inside my rock-hard enamel. (I'm talking about teeth here.) Fortunately, I brush my teeth and floss with a vengeance. Only a little ways to go before a root canal and it's good-bye, nerves.XP

Inggy thinks she's the black sheep of the family. But then she's really nice to the parents too, considering. I mean inside she's really kind to them. Understanding and everything. (At least during the time she made her scrapbook anyway.:D) Mum and dad don't really know what they're dissing and making duro to the ground. They're looking at the wrong black sheep.XP

Because I don't give a whit about them. The sooner I get out and make my own money and stand on my own feet, the better. It's all so CRUDDY to have to still depend on them for monetary purposes and shit. Thank you for the money, I'll send you a check in about five years.XP But as soon as I can, I'm walking away without a backward glance. Good riddance.:P

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Yahow, another rant.XD

2005-04-03T12:22:00.000+08:00

Good grievance. Been coasting through my previous entries and whew, either I crammed me blog chock-full of tests or I crammed it with "bloody fuck"s. Hahaha. What fun.

But oh, I remember something (one of the things anyway) that I've been meaning to blog!:D Last, erm, Wednesday I think, went to school for summer training. Rode an FX (which will be followed by the MRT, then the LRT, but oh, before that, meet RJ on the way!:D) and then there were these two semi-old women (um. late middle age. something like that.o_0) right across from me, and they were carrying out this conversation about a mutual friend...

Semi-old Woman #1: Si [kwan], sino na nga ba asawa niya?
Semi-old Woman #2: Ah, yung nagtitinda ng prutas sa Ayala? Kaso ngayon wala na ulit trabaho...
SOW (haha, sow. that's funny.XD) #1: o0, yun...bakit ganun, e ang dami-daming nanliligaw kay [kwan], may engineer, may ganito etc etc, bat yun pa napili niya?
SOW #2: sabagay, gwapo naman. at least magaganda yung mga anak nila.
SOW #1: magaganda nga, wala namang makain...

And all through this conversation I believe my face was continuously contorting into various depictions of WHAT THE FUCK?? Good grievance, is that all the Juans and Juanas (errr. Petras? Marias?o_0) are looking for these days?? sabagay, gwapo naman?? MyGED.o_0 In the first place, stop fucking around! Good GOD cannot you lot do anything more productive than procreate?? You're filling our sad country with more and more little gremlins who you can't feed properly anyway much less give a proper education and what will they turn out to be in the end?? The same kind who thinks the main goal of life is to land a pretty face and fuck 'til you're all dry.XP Good GRIEVANCE. Kulang na kulang na nga tayo sa trabaho, pararamihin niyo pa ang mga tao??? I remember we were going through errr Tandang Sora, was it?? and there were all these dudes (with sandos or none at all with humongous pot bellies that have hardened over time, good GOD, typical) and dames just sitting around with a truckload of little children galloping around them, sitting on their laps, blah dee blah. And what is THAT supposed to be, pray tell?? Family quality time?? Are we supposed to say awwww, look at them having fun doing absolutely nothing but bask in the sun like potbellied lizards? Are we supposed to say ooooh look at the happy children, wow children are our light and joy, let's go make some more??XP

And the same goes for everyone else (read: mum and dad!XP five bloody children! tapos ngayon nag-iinarte kayo tungkol sa mga tuition and everything?? I find it rather hard to muster up proper sympathy.XP)

Find a proper fucking job and make sure you can actually produce economically useful people before you go to the actual making of the useful people.

Or use bloody condoms! What's so hard about using bloody condoms?? High school kids can unroll 'em five seconds tops!XP

Aaaaaaaaaaaand I ranted again. So this entry is of the "bloody fuck" kind. Harharhar. Maybe I'll do tests next time.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Blah.

2005-04-03T11:47:00.000+08:00

Hrm. Drattit. I know I had lots and lots to blog here but now that I'm here, um, wala na. Whoosh. Goes my brain.XP At wala na akong maisip iblog.o_0 This is sad. Really.

Had my braces tightened yesterday. Now I'm staring sadly at lunch. Kanina I stared sadly at breakfast. Using advanced methods of high-level deduction, I believe I shall be staring sadly at dinner tonight as well.XP I'm hungry.

Pero bilib ako kay kevin ha. Medyo lang.o_0 Had two teeth ripped outta him and he can still eat. MyGED.

I seem to have misplaced my jumprope.o_0 Looks like I'll have to use the spare invisible one.XP Doesn't do much in the way of coordination, though.

I really do think I had a lotta things I was planning to write here! Grf. Dangit. Ohwell.o_0

Oh, and Queena Lee-Chua apparently thinks I'm turning the Paulinian name around. Because usually, we Paulinians are known daw for humanities (coming from Queena, that simply means we SUCK at math.XD No, really. Our math curriculum SUCKS.) but no, I'm doing oh-so-excellently daw in ME.o_0 Apparently, someone didn't look at my Ma21 and 22 grades very properly.XP But oh, Queena knows me!:D Hurrah!:D

Good grievance. Can I stagnate anymore here in this household? I am sick and tired of the little brats pounding away on the PS2 day and night. Inggy's and my PS2, if I want to get tetchy about it. Which I am.XP Hrmf. One more week and say goodbye to our PS2 forever, brats!XP

Which reminds me. Need to come up with a new roomie pront0. Gahhh. Like as in by April 5 pront0. Which is like two days away. Gahhh.

I have absolutely nothing else I can think of to blog. Good grievance. Hence I shall vamoose.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

FUCK!

2005-03-30T01:52:00.001+08:00

FUCK YOU JAJA! TANGINA MOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!! ANLAKAS NG LOOB MONG MAGPARAMDAM, TANGINA MO ANDITO KA PALA SA PINAS! IKAW RIN ELAINE! KALA MO NAKALIMUTAN NA KITA???????

Fuck all you people who shirk on your utangs and run away like the fucking monkeys you are and leave us poor people to pay for you fuckers! AAAAAARRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

Fuck you all! GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!! I must have MONEY! MONEY! MONEY! MONEY so I can rule the world and unceremoniously kill all of you off and mount your fucking heads on fucking pikes in front of my fucking stronghold! GRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Falqi! Enough with the stupid tests!XP

2005-03-28T22:54:00.000+08:00

Your Love Style is Storge

For you, love and friendship are almost the same thing
And your love tends to be the enduring, long lasting kind (You've been known to still have connections with exes)
But sometimes your love is not the most passionate
Leap before you look, and you'll find that fire you crave

..........right...so what's a storge?o_0

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

HOT.X0

2005-03-28T22:25:00.000+08:00

Gahhhh, hot.XP It is abysmally hot. HOT HOT HOT.X0 Dude pare gaaaaaaaaaahd it's HOT.X0 Can I just say.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Wala lang.

2005-03-28T01:18:00.000+08:00

Gaaaaaaaaahd. Everyone else's blogs are unupdated, presumably because they have far more interesting things to do.XP Sob. Which leaves me, um, where? I update like every other hour.X0 Gahhhhhhd.

Oooooooooooh nga pala Kevin, seryoso na 'to ha, gym tayo! Yah0w!XD Hahaha. We must always support each other in order to attain our common goals, hurrah.:D

Yahow, summer training tomorruh. At least I'll be able to go out and about again.:D Masisilayan ko na rin ang aking irog after many long years, hurrah.

Whoops, must mosey off to bed. Sleep and all that. You know.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Silicon I Am.

2005-03-27T14:05:00.000+08:00

Si... Silicon

Interesting. Take a bunch of really common person-elements and throw them together to get something truely exceptional... that's you. You are probably someone that gave up on trying to understand society at large a long time ago. You don't fear it, but you don't try to be one with it either. You are more or less unperturbed by things... if a problem comes up you might deal with it, or you might avoid it... whatever. You don't take kindly to people pushing you around, and you don't really push anyone else around. You're probably the only one that can tame oxygen simply because you don't understand it's raging neediness, but that doesn't mean that you'll really enjoy having a tame oxygen hanging around all that much either. You can probably get along with people like yourself really well, but you aren't your own soulmate... if only they could make entire colonies of people like you you'd be stoked. Just like you don't understand society, society doesn't understand you... and yes that is my excuse for not knowing how to describe you better.

-------------

righty-h0.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Warning. Lots of "bloody fuck"s ahead.

2005-03-26T18:55:00.000+08:00

Bloody fuck. Nakakainiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis.XP

Inggy and I were all set to go jogging at school, kasama namin si daddy who was off to get the stupid computer that never actually worked in the first place sa apartment, and he was all, oooooooooh, yeah, I can dismantle this on my own, like what fucking rot, so anyway balak namin ni Inggy magjogging while he fiddled away and whatever, and holy fucking crap my heart was like all set to go jogging na and shit because I've been absolutely stagnant here in this FUCKING STAGNANT house for the past...I don't know...three days?? (I swear, this hole sucks you in and warps all sense of time.XP) So anyway, turns out we had to help daddy do his precious dismantling (kaya mag-isa, HA) and then when we were all set in the car I went like, o daddy, punta na tayong school! And he went, o para san? And I was like, where the hell has he been?? Duuude, didn't you get my message kanina pa sa house?? Didn't you get the jogging outfits we're wearing like right bloody now?? And then he just vroomed the car away and said, bukas na lang kayo magjogging, gising nang maaga tas sa Fort Boni. Like HELL that's ever going to come true. I can bet my bloody fucking LIFE we're not going bloody fucking ANYWHERE tomorrow. I'm bloody fucking ROTTING HERE. Look at the little sod, now comfortably plunked in front of the telly. Tas mamaya-maya it's straight off zoooooooom to bed, FUCK. Like all he ever does around the house is fucking SLEEP.XP

It doesn't need a great deal of imagination to try to imagine where I get my slothful, utterly unproductive and stagnating genes which I try OH SO HARD to combat...*sob*...I do, I do...but sometimes you just don't have the fucking MONEY and FREEDOM to GET BLOODY FUCKING AWAY...X0

O, it's Easter. Summer vacation. All that crap. And I BET YOU this household is going to die of fucking stagnation and is going to end up food for the roaches. Bloody FUCK.XP Thank GOD there's school. I've never been so grateful for school in my entire LIFE. GAAAAAAAAHHHHDDD. I absolutely HATE any and all sorts of vacation which entail me to park my butt HERE in the HOUSE. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAHD.

I HATE THIS BLOODY FUCKING HOUSE!X0

Grrrraaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrr.

...I wonder if it's that time of the month already kaya ako nagkakaganito. Hmmmm. But no, it's too early.

SHIT. Now what am I supposed to do here sa house???XP Jump rope maybe. Run up and down the bloody fucking stairs maybe. And create a great big fucking ruckus that maybe, just maybe will get these fucking slobs off their fucking fatasses.

..and hey, I warned you.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Shit! Shit! GC!

2005-03-26T16:24:00.000+08:00

Gaaaaaaaaaaah.X0 Awful bout of GC-ness about to come...X0

I need to maintain a B+ average for the rest of my college life so I can graduate cum laude. Waaaaaaah. That sucks.X0

Wala akong magawa. Obviously.XP Must go out now and...err...jog or something.:D

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Another test!:D

2005-03-25T21:10:00.000+08:00

You scored 58.3%
Artemis

If you are ruled by Artemis, your independent spirit belongs to no one but yourself. Your body is vibrant, your attitude robust and your manner vigorous and alive. You are driven by physical rather than mental energy. You feel complete without a man in your life and would never compromise your essential nature for a romantic partner. You are skilled at establishing personal boundaries and enter into relationships on your own terms -- in short, you can take care of yourself. This attitude may at times put men off.

You scored 25%
Aphrodite

If you are ruled mostly by Aphrodite, your femininity and passionate spirit are the controlling forces in your life. You tend to be charismatic and self-assured, comfortable with your body and unrestrained sexually. Men are drawn to you like bees to flowers, which satisfies your erotic nature. However, you tend not to form permanent attachments with lovers because you value your sexual freedom, which may leave you feeling lonely and even depleted once a relationship ends.

You scored 8.3%
Hera

If you possess many of Hera's qualities, you tend to find fulfillment in relationships and look on marriage as a permanent union. In marriage, you feel no sense of frustration or resentment, because you are an equal partner with your spouse. You are confident and have no trouble asserting your authority in and out of the relationship. You seek men who are self-confident and successful, because you are comfortable with the concept that you can be fulfilled through him (and him through you). As long as your partner honors the marriage as much as you do and appreciates you, you will be happy. If he doesn't, you must concentrate on your own growth and discover an identity independent of him.

You scored 8.3%
Persephone

If you exemplify the qualities of Persephone, you have most likely experienced great loss in your life -- the loss of your health or your emotional or physical security, the betrayal of a friend or lover, the loss of a child, your own divorce or that of your parents. This experience has forced you to face the dark, unenlightened side of yourself (the side that blames other people or circumstances for your own suffering) and transform yourself into a stronger, more independent, more accepting and more loving person. It may have also led you down a spiritual path, and moved you to place great emphasis on inner calm and on close connections with friends. You are capable of embracing, integrating and accepting difficult experiences. Because of that skill, you offer others the gift of empathy -- you know where people are or have been.

------------

...o_0 Hera. Right. Marriage???XP EEWIES.XP Grabedad, and I got zero for Athena!XP Like what's up with THAT?XP Got zero for Demeter and Hestia too. Dapat lang, like hello, nurturing, caregiving, motherly types? Eew.XP But Athena! Waaah.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Another Test!:D

2005-03-25T20:32:00.000+08:00

YOUR RELATIONSHIP STYLE

The first step in discovering your best match is getting a clear picture of your own relationship style. Good or bad, your experiences with your parents -- in childhood and adulthood -- play a key role in establishing your relationship style and the kind of person who you're best suited for now. Based on your experiences, you will probably fall naturally into one of three categories:

? Isolator: If you are an Isolator, you need a lot of personal space. Isolators minimize emotion, are often guarded and unconsciously push people away, keeping them at a distance.

? Fuser: If you are a Fuser, you have an insatiable appetite for closeness and don't like being alone. Fusers crave attention and are sometimes described as clingy.

? Ambivalent: If you are an Ambivalent, you are a little bit of both. Ambivalents like to pull away, yet they want to feel close at the same time. They can also be confusing and hard to read.

YOUR FREE personalized introductory results, based on your test responses:

YOU ARE AN AMBIVALENT

YOUR CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES

Your childhood experiences show that you are an Ambivalent. As a child, you probably received plenty of love and affection from your parents but were also allowed to form your own sense of independence. Your parents may have upset you and let you down at times, but your childhood needs were essentially met. Therefore, as an adult, you have traits that are common in both Isolators and Fusers, two polar opposites. This means that your relationship style includes many interesting contradictions. You've been known to both push people away and expect them to dote on you at the same time. Freedom is just as appealing to you as being showered with affection.

YOUR PERFECT PARTNER

As an Ambivalent, you're uniquely qualified to have a successful relationship with a partner from either category: Fusers or Isolators.In your case, "happily ever after" depends on which role you find yourself adopting more often. If you're usually the outgoing one in the relationship, often seeking affection and attention, you're more of a Fuser. This means that your perfect partner is actually your opposite type, an Isolator. You may have guessed just the contrary, that your best match would be someone who would shower you with all the love and affection you crave. But happiness for you means partnering with someone who will respect your privacy and support you when you want to do independent activities, much like your parents did.If you're often a private person who likes her space, you're more of an Isolator. This means that your perfect partner is actually your opposite type, a Fuser. Contrary to what you might have thought, your best match is not someone who gives you all the space and freedom you crave. Instead, your best bet for long-term happiness is partnering with someone who dotes on you, someone who shows his affection and expresses his emotions easily and often, just as your parents did.

---------

Hahaha. Too, too true.XD Oooooh, I looooooooove tests.XD

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Zoids! Zoids! and Zoids!:D

2005-03-25T15:42:00.000+08:00

Gahhhh. I really do have too much time on my hands. Shit, I hate it here sa house, it has this horrible ability to make me feel like I'm stuck fast in the sinkhole of eternal gloom and doom.XP I swear. I can feel me stagnating already.XP My family is the most stagnant family of all.X0 Gahhhh.

Since I have way too much time on my hands, ayan tuloy, I ogled at and drooled over the Zoids at the website Jego gave me. (I blame you! You! You!XP wahahaha.) I now have a more concrete list of oodley prettyful Zoids that I shall acquire once the Central Bank lays off lollygagging around and finally gets around printing my millions.XP

(in no particular order other than the order in which i put 'em...hahaha labo.XD)
1. Ultrasaurus
2. Shadowfox
3. Madthunder
4. Saberlion
5. Liger Zero Phoenix
6. Rayse Tiger
7. Molga (actually, I had one dati. But someone ruined it.XP Hmmm, come to think of it, that someone ruined my Shield Liger too. Bloody little gremlin.XP)
8. Death Saurer
9. Sinker
10. Lightning Saix
11. Death Stinger
12. Liger Zero X
13. Seismosaurus
14. Energy Liger

Hahaha. I'm such a kid.XD (in so many ways, yes.:D)

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

Gahhhhhh. Too much time on my hands.

2005-03-25T14:15:00.000+08:00

Hay. Just been from contemplating on my life.XP Gahh. Where would you like to go? (A farm!:D humwahahaha. si ingga lang makakagets.XP) Sure, I'm in ME and everything, but really, one needs kapalness of the face and sheer guts to elbow her way into the rat race.XP I don't like rat races!X0 Why can't we all just be peaceful and harmonious and friendly with all mankind??XP Waaaaaah. I'm not competitive at all. (no, really.) I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. I don't want to elevate myself at the expense of others, which is what people inevitably need to do in order to get up there (quit being idealistic about it, duh). Waaaaaaaaah. Why can't I just build a nice peaceful home up in the cool green mountains (ok fine, right beside the beach para naman masaya yung isang tao jan, wahaha) where I can paint (digitally, I mean, because I suck at the real thing, waharhar) and ogle at the sky and maybe make like the Shaolin monks for a bit then afterwards cruise the world on my private jet (okay, this is where I get carried away. Stop now, Izzy.XP) blah dee blah...

Gahhhhhhhh. Where am I going??XP Waaaaaaaaaah. I don't know. I don't have concrete goals about business and work and money-making et cetera.XP All I have is this vague notion of being filthy rich so I can maybe finance the preservation and propagation of arnis in the country (whooo like maybe build a huge complex like the one we saw in Chungju for Taekgyon, it was all big and vast and green and fieldy and meadowy and had cool big lawns and bridges and humongous steps and ooooooooh, that was UBER COOL!:o and then it'd be free so anyone can join, but hooooooo how the hell are we supposed to maintain THAT on the goodwill of the people??o_0 ooooooooh then maybe we could make arnis into a National Treasure just like Taekgyon....hmmm, dooooooode, does the Philippines even have National Treasures??o_0 If they do, errr the citizens don't know about it. Or maybe it's just me.XP I don't know anything.XP oh, crud.)

Sooooooo, like I was saying, what am I to do with all this kerfuffle called work?XP I haven't the faintest idea.XP gahhhh.

Hmmmmmmmmmm. Methinks I shall just sit down and read today.XP No use going out as it's Good Friday, and everything everywhere is closed, gahhhh. I swear, NO CONSIDERATION whatsoever for us religionless agnostics.XP Hasn't it crossed their Catholic minds that maybe us religionless agnostics would, I dunno, want to go wall-climbing maybe?? Or maybe watch a movie or something??XP Hmmm. I could go jogging out in Fort Boni, that's totally free, but then I'd have to learn how to drive pronto, because nobody wants to share how to commute there, the selfish little turds.XP Why does doing anything nowadays entail the use of the very thing which I do not posess at the moment, moolah??XP Gaaaaaaaaaaahddemit.XP

BORED. BORED. Utterly BORED. BORED. BORED.

See? How the heck am I to survive eight-hours-a-day-five-days-a-week boring office life??XP gahhhhh. Die. Die. Die.XP Unless we have bunjee-jumping-on-weekends bonuses, which I don't think any firm has. Yet.XP

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.