Whining again. Cathartic, ain't it.

Private-ized my previous previous entry.XP I am back to being the nice person that I am.XP So for those of you lucky enough to have caught a whiff of that particular entry, a round and a half for you. (of applause, not drinks. Although if it were I'll be happy to join.XD) You caught a glimpse of nasty me. But since generally I am uber nice (read: all my nasty thoughts are nicely tucked away) I have nicely tucked away again that errant shirttail, so to speak, because it was dangling out when it should not be seen by anybody.

SO. I AM NGARAG. I shall SO be happy when our report in fricking History is fricking over.XP

Eek, here I go. Another rant coming.

I am SO fed up of this workaday, predictable scheme of things.XP Study to get work, work for the rest of life to live, and on the sidelines try to live for real. Bleah. Crappy crappy crappy. I am BORED BORED BORED. On top of that, I want to get away from all of this!XP I want my own adventure with no rules or expectations!XP I am SO damn sick and tired of school, where I have to maintain my grades GAHHHH for goodness-knows-what, when it's a fact of life that really high grades won't guarantee you'll get filthy rich later on, and HOOOOOOOO holy grande look at all those morons on TV that make a billion a year, grrrrrrrrrr. And WHY OH WHY must I always have this need to prove myself to people?XP I have to constantly maintain my grades or be good at everything and goodness knows what else. WHHHHHYYYYY do I always need to prove to others and to myself that I'm not ordinary, I'm not mediocre, and if I don't constantly strive to be "great" I'll blend into everyone else?? I don't want to fade away.....BLEAAAAAAAARGH I am fed up.XP I suppose if I really wanted to, I could study my ass off like a prime nerd like some people I know who think grades and school are everything, then I suppose I could get ridiculously high grades like A+s and crap, but really, out in the world, who the heck cares?XP

And why am I such a dratted people pleaser? For once I wish I could be a really bitchy bitch and say what I want and do what I want but noooooo, my conscience is firmly stuck to my behind.XP Is it even conscience??XP ...No, it's still my ego, preventing me from putting dents in relationships that should be kept alive and well because they're most useful to me that way.XP WHYYYYYYY do I always try to be disgustingly tactful and considerate and crud?XP AAAAAAAARGGGGHHHH.

BORED BORED BORED BORED. I am currently walking/floating/shuffling/loafing along through life as one in a dream. Para akong isang malaking bangag. Gaaaaaaaaah boring boring boring.

AND YES, I have the luxury to be bored in life dahil I am one of the fortunate people who gets to eat three times a day ang gets to study and crap.XP MAN, do I have to qualify myself even when I'm ranting? WHY should I care what other people think? AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGHHHHHH.

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As you can see, I am going through one of those low phases in life where you suddenly get hit with the all-encompassing question: WHY?

And when you can't answer it satisfactorily, this is the result, I am afraid. A whiny bitch.XP