People say it would've been so easy to text or call.

No, it wouldn't. And no, it's not.

Because people don't come. And the only time they would actually have come is right after the bloody fact when they only thing they can do is wring their hands and say, "oh, if only I'd come!"

In a parallel branching reality, those same people would be saying, "But it would've been so easy to text or call!"

Really. How would YOU know the gravity of that hesitant text, that tiny little call? No, you won't. You'll only know when it's too late.

theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.

...Hello?

...without any ado at all, I'm back. Bow.

And for the life of me, I don't think I can write for shit anymore. XP Sadness. The piercing wit! The dazzling vocabulary repertoire! The legions of adoring fans! Gone. All. Gone. :<

**********

My New Love.


I. WANTS IT!!!!! I. REALLY. DO. WANTS IT!!!!!

**********

...So. How am I, you ask. Of course you care. You should care. How could you not care?

...HOW COULD YOU NOT CARE???

Ooooookay, got a bit neurotic there. :p Hemingway. Moving forward. ...Ick. Ahem. Moving on is what I meant. How am I? I am meandering around in a stagnant little pool of...meandering little things. Think little fishy things with wobbly, gloopy, on-the-whole-looks-rather-sluggish-dunnit bits.

...Obviously, I am having a mental breakdown. Hurrah hurrah. Will make working with the bosses much easier now, I expect.

"Falqi, what's the plan on lahdeedahdeedah? Let's get eksekseks on the blahblahblah and lock it today, let's get eksekseksnumbertwo aligned as well. What are the numbers behind the dududu plans? Have we confirmed this with all the possible people in the world? Let's just quickly check on all the possible data we have right now which is admittedly a lot but since I can order you around do it now & get back to me in 5 mins, there's a love. Oh and while you're at it go and do all this eks-wai-zee number of things which I expect you to do by the end of the week which you should because I have a whole slew of other things I want you to do over the weekend and oh by the way I'm not sure if you know what you're doing but you seem to trundling along just fine so hop along then, there we go, sple-he-he-ndid."

And I go: "duh?"

WUNNNNNDERFUL.


theHERETICisIN.
o come, all ye faithful.